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Goofnut's definitions

Maskhole

1. Any jerk who refuses to wear a face mask during the COVID-19 pandemic.
2. Any jerk who mocks people wearing facemasks during the COVID-19 pandemic.
3. Any jerk who tries to remove your face mask during the COVID-19 pandemic.
Some maskhole pulled off the nurse’s N95 mask.
by Goofnut May 31, 2020
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Five-Wheeler

Five-Wheeler

Most US states imprint a small wheelchair emblem on the license plates of “handicapped” drivers. Thus, the emblem constitutes a fifth wheel for a handicapped driver’s vehicle, thereby rendering the car a five-wheeler.
Since losing a leg to diabetes, Roger drives his five-wheeler to the donut shop.
by Goofnut April 1, 2025
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Boating

When you drive your car through a large puddle of water in the gutter of a street so fast that you soak pedestrians walking alongside said road with a huge and filthy wave.
During yesterday’s rainstorm, we went boating in my pickup truck and soaked a fat jogger with a dirty wave so big it knocked his hat off.
by Goofnut March 16, 2023
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Five-wheeler

Five-wheeler

Most US states imprint a small wheelchair emblem on the license plates of “handicapped” drivers. Thus, the emblem constitutes a fifth wheel for a handicapped driver’s vehicle, thereby rendering the car a five-wheeler.
Since losing a leg to diabetes, Roger drives a five-wheeler to the donut shop.
by Goofnut April 1, 2025
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Five

Five-wheeler

Most US states imprint a small wheelchair emblem on the license plates of “handicapped” drivers. Thus, the emblem constitutes a fifth wheel for a handicapped driver’s vehicle, thereby rendering the car a five-wheeler.
Since losing a leg to diabetes, Roger drives a five-wheeler to the donut shop.
by Goofnut April 1, 2025
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Nostrildamus

Something you can smell before you see or hear it (e.g., shit, fire, dirty pussy, politicians, etc.) .
James’ inner nostrildamus knew when the pie was ready.

Suzy was such a nostrildamus for finding trouble.
by Goofnut June 2, 2021
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taller in a chair

When a person's fat ass is so fuckin' gigantic that they're taller sitting than standing. A person whose ass is thicker than six Tokyo phonebooks.
(a.k.a. - "taller sitting.").
Ms. Bertha is so damn gigantic that she's two inches taller in a chair than she is when she's standing; assuming the chair doesn't collapse
by Goofnut November 19, 2023
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