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Royal Roads University

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place. Former military college specialising in Engineering and Weapons System Management that has fallen on hard times and is now forced to survive by teaching liberal arts courses and adult upgrading. Beautiful grounds with plenty of flowers make it a delight for offspring of the idle rich.

No sports teams.

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Yo. Dude. You going to college in the fall?

Yeah. But it's Royal Roads University.

Score!
by gnostic1 September 17, 2012
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family pack

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n. Several. More than expected. Usually used for comic effect when viewing a friend's accumulation of bongs, cigars, skateboards, nipples etc.

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Hey bro! Check out all these buds man.

Dude! Looks like you bought the family pack.
by gnostic1 September 2, 2012
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misstranslation

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n. The politically incorrect result of translating technical or mathematical terminology into something women can understand. A misstranslation is usually devoid of numbers and greek letters and may deal with how force vectors "feel" about each other. Use of the term around women is usually followed by a good purse-smacking.

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So why are pie squared? I don't get it.

Sorry, I didn't see your breasts. Let me give you the misstranslation. Pretend you have a large round blanket and four babies that need to be covered.

Ohhh. Babies! What are their names?
by gnostic1 August 31, 2012
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Tynersburg

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place. Industrial city where most of Ohio's fridge magnets are forged. Located where the magnetite miners had easy access to both water and oil Tynersburg grew from a small hamlet to a bustling metropolis at the turn of the century when fridges began to be formed from metal instead of wood.

Home of the Fighting Woodchuks pasanka choir and a Bavarian Beer Stein interpretive center, Tynersburg boasts a bold hold on the past and a niche-based future.

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Isn't Tynersburg the home of both an Olympic archer and a famous composer of Indian ragas?

Why yes. I believe it is, and I think you can buy cleverly constructed fridge magnets celebrating both of them.
by gnostic1 August 10, 2012
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green

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adj. Formerly just a colour but now an indication of almost religious perfection in a foodstuff, industrial product, or political party: purity, organicity, hard work by unionised workers and a complete lack of chemicals found in the periodic table is implied.

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Are these beans green?

Yeah. Look at them.

I know they're green. But are they green?

Yes. I told you. They are verdant little kernels suffused with, nay, bursting with, greenness.

But are they green?

No.
by gnostic1 August 8, 2012
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hammer throw

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n. Perhaps the most arcane and archaic field event still contested at the Olympics and only marginally less silly than tug o'war or tossing the caber as a competition for grown ups. Strong lobbying by Canada and Scotland, who use hammer throwing in their cross-training for tossing granite rocks in ice-curling, keeps the sport from going the way of the Dodo and the standing fish-slap.

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Do you think folks would watch the hammer throw if we made the competitors stand in deep sand and wear skimpy bathing suits?

No.
by gnostic1 August 8, 2012
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Blindman River

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place. A bustling commune south of Blackfalds in the upper cretaceous part of Alberta. Founded in 1968 by born-again pacifists Blindman River rapidly became the local centre of gravel-related industry. Reknowned for their kettle-corn maize and recently built fancy string-bag factory the devoted inhabitants are fighting to bring prosperity and a modicum of educated classiness to the region. Clothing-optional Fridays attract new recruits for the weekends but the lack of advancement opportunities and long chants usually result in a mass exodus of the new blood by Tuesday.

Twice voted Commune of the Year by New Moon Monthly the commune is hoping to have an on-site schoolhouse completed soon.

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I need a macrame bag for my lap-top. Let's stop into Blindman River.

Why not wait until Friday?
by gnostic1 August 7, 2012
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