Gary Vitalis's definitions
An individual, usually a young black male, who converts to Islam while in prison and then returns to his pre-Muslim ways when on the outside.
James can be seen in his dad's front yard sippin' on a foty (fourty ounce malt liquor bottle), eatin' fried pork skins, smokin' Newports, and beatin' on his old lady--a classic Malt Liquor Muslim.
by Gary Vitalis February 6, 2007
Get the Malt Liquor Muslim mug.Very tight fitting black jeans worn by obese women who have just dropped five pounds in water weight in an effort to show the world that they are no longer fat. These jeans are black since this color hides rolls better than light colors and are usually debuted with hands in the air and a techno beat and pushed along with the temporary arrogance of knowing that turkey is better for you than pork.
Oprah reinvents herself about every five years and walks onto the show wearing her famous Oprah Jeans. Don't we all love getting parenting advice form the richest and most barren woman on the planet?
by Gary Vitalis October 19, 2009
Get the Oprah Jeans mug.Any late 1990's model Dodge Caravan, Ford Windstar, or Mercury Villager registering at least 180,000 miles and usually purchased at buy-here-pay-here car lots. These vehicles are driven by recently-arrived Mexicans, Guatemalans, and Hondurans and are easily identified by chromed plastic hubcaps, flame and soccer ball decals, and dashboards decorated like a Guadalajaran Hooker's living room. Driver beware! These vehicles have a way of eating insurance cards and inhaling the carpet fibers causes amnesia in drivers when asked their names by law enforcement officials. These vehicles also have the ability to become invisible on traffic court day.
Many fine examples of MexiVans can be spied on Sunday afternoons parked outside of Auto Zones throughout the United States.
by Gary Vitalis August 4, 2007
Get the MexiVan mug.A black woman in a Volvo or Saab. This refers to the tendency of middle class African-American women in the Atlanta, Georgia area to buy mid-priced European sedans, particularly those from Sweden.
by Gary Vitalis April 2, 2007
Get the Swedish Chocolate mug.Sandals worn by liberals, women in Vermont, and for some unknown reason, evangelical youth pastors trying to appeal to young adherents of Christianity.
Pastor Mike has a goatee and wears Birkenstocks--he looks like a pothead for Jesus when in reality his only addictions are online porn and energy drinks.
by Gary Vitalis February 24, 2007
Get the Birkenstocks mug.Puerto Rico is the island so beautiful on which nobody in his right mind wants to live. This shithole is bragged about as being paradise only by those Puerto Ricans living in the mainland who know they have a way out. This is the perfect place to go if you are white and would like to part ways with your wallet. Many Puerto Ricans claim to speak Castillian Spanish and pick to pieces Anglo Spanish teachers who believe in the grammatical purtiy of Spanish. Only a small fraction of Puerto Ricans living in the U.S. proper can create a grammatical construction in Spanish. If you have actually met a Puerto Rican male who has read one novel (novella for our latino friends) you have met a true celebrity.
by Gary Vitalis June 29, 2009
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