Gary Vitalis's definitions
A delicious snack consisting of green (raw), unshelled peanuts boiled in salt water. This delicacy is typically purchased in gas station parking lots and roadside vegetable stands and consumed by southerners of all socio-economic backgrounds. Almost always served in Styrofoam cups and wrapped in the skimpiest napkin ever made, this salty snack is intended to be shared with family and friends although it is not uncommon for asocial types to devour the whole cup as to not share any with his wife/mistress.
Rich Birmingham Business Man: Mama, I got a cup of boiled peanuts for the Auburn vs. Alabama game.
Broke-Ass Methamphetamine-Addicted Construction Worker: Mama, I got a cup of boiled peanuts for the Auburn vs. Alabama game.
Broke-Ass Methamphetamine-Addicted Construction Worker: Mama, I got a cup of boiled peanuts for the Auburn vs. Alabama game.
by Gary Vitalis February 19, 2007
Get the Boiled Peanuts mug.Any late 1990's model Dodge Caravan, Ford Windstar, or Mercury Villager registering at least 180,000 miles and usually purchased at buy-here-pay-here car lots. These vehicles are driven by recently-arrived Mexicans, Guatemalans, and Hondurans and are easily identified by chromed plastic hubcaps, flame and soccer ball decals, and dashboards decorated like a Guadalajaran Hooker's living room. Driver beware! These vehicles have a way of eating insurance cards and inhaling the carpet fibers causes amnesia in drivers when asked their names by law enforcement officials. These vehicles also have the ability to become invisible on traffic court day.
Many fine examples of MexiVans can be spied on Sunday afternoons parked outside of Auto Zones throughout the United States.
by Gary Vitalis August 4, 2007
Get the MexiVan mug.Puerto Rico is the island so beautiful on which nobody in his right mind wants to live. This shithole is bragged about as being paradise only by those Puerto Ricans living in the mainland who know they have a way out. This is the perfect place to go if you are white and would like to part ways with your wallet. Many Puerto Ricans claim to speak Castillian Spanish and pick to pieces Anglo Spanish teachers who believe in the grammatical purtiy of Spanish. Only a small fraction of Puerto Ricans living in the U.S. proper can create a grammatical construction in Spanish. If you have actually met a Puerto Rican male who has read one novel (novella for our latino friends) you have met a true celebrity.
by Gary Vitalis June 29, 2009
Get the Puerto Rico mug.A black woman in a Volvo or Saab. This refers to the tendency of middle class African-American women in the Atlanta, Georgia area to buy mid-priced European sedans, particularly those from Sweden.
by Gary Vitalis April 2, 2007
Get the Swedish Chocolate mug.A retirement plan, of sorts, where an individual makes a bogus back injury claim and files for unemployment, social security, and/or insurance payments. This is a steady source of income for many dirtbags living in Alabama and Mississippi.
by Gary Vitalis February 12, 2007
Get the Alabama 401K mug.Sandals worn by liberals, women in Vermont, and for some unknown reason, evangelical youth pastors trying to appeal to young adherents of Christianity.
Pastor Mike has a goatee and wears Birkenstocks--he looks like a pothead for Jesus when in reality his only addictions are online porn and energy drinks.
by Gary Vitalis February 24, 2007
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