Garthy's definitions

Pork and Beans

A term to describe a Happy Shopper, or Betty Both. One who bowls from both the Pavillion and the members' end. Half rice, Half Chips.

'Birthdays:David Bowie, formerly Pork and Beans, now just beans, singer, 56 today' ('The Times' Jan 8th, 2003)

by Garthy September 19, 2006

Dutch oven

Beneath the bedclothes after someone has played ‘Reveille' on the botty bugle.

"A Dutch Oven is the art of cooking ones partners' head beneath the bedclothes using cabbage-gas, made popular by Emperor Julius Ceaser during the hieght of Roman rule in Europe". (Adam Hart-Davies, from the popular TV series 'What the Romans did for us, 2003')

by Garthy September 19, 2006

Gary Glitter

rhym. slang

Shitter. Reference to either the arse-hole, or the komode

"Wheres Charles?", Elizabeth pondered out loud,"He's in the Gary Glitter taking Camilla up the Gary Glitter" replied Philip

by Garthy September 19, 2006

art pamphlet

A jazz or scud magazine; one handed reading material.

"Hey Gordon, wheres the art pamphlets, Cherie's on the blob and i'm gonna have to knock one out before I address Parliament on climate change". "There in the shitter where you left them Tony, you fucking twat"

by Garthy September 19, 2006

horses collar

Vagina. Also sim. to imply generous proportions

"She's got a fanny like a horses collar" (as opposed to a mouse's ear).

by Garthy September 19, 2006

loose sausage meat

Flaccid penis which cannot be funnelled into a condom.

As in "Sorry love, I've got loose sausage meat ".

by Garthy September 19, 2006

Beer Goggles

Imaginary optical aids through which ugly women begin to appear attractive after you have drunk too much beer.

"What? You fancy that!?! You must be wearing beer goggles".

by garthy July 8, 2006