drug monster

Another common Tomism with humorous implications, "drug monster" refers to a person whose personality is higly changeable through use of drugs. It also refers to one who uses a large quantity of drugs and implies a dependence on such drugs.

Frank took a speedball, two hits off the bong, an LSD cube and a 'lude. Man, he is one drug monster!

by Frank Klaune February 13, 2005

leakatorium

Slang for the restroom or WC. The term is a more polite version of "pissalorium" suitable for use in mixed audiences. It makes you appear highly intelligent and sophisticated as if you know Latin, when in reality, you think it's a language spoken in Latvia.

Ladies, excuse me. I must attend the leakatorium.

by Frank Klaune January 26, 2005

geemer

A cross between "Geek" and "Gomer" (as in "Gomer Pyle", the bumbling army private from the television series of the same name). The term "geemer" was popularized by A.J. "Vakodak" and was also used as a term for the once famous international tennis star, Guiliermo ("Geemer") Vilas.

"Look at that guy with the pocket protector and the highwater pants. God, what a geemer!"

by Frank Klaune March 05, 2004

jackin' the beanstalk

One of many euphemisms for "masturbation" (e.g. slappin' the salami, jack off, beat off, buffing the bishop, glean the obscene bean, choking the chicken, spanking the monkey, waxing the wonker, greasing the guppy, shooting putty at the moon, and Rosie Palmer and her Five Sisters doing the Four Knuckle Shuffle.

Frank will be a little bit late. He's still back at his house jackin' the beanstalk.

by Frank Klaune January 24, 2005

click it and stick it

A phrase used by many American right-thinking, freedom-loving people who are keenly aware of the continual erosion of civil rights, privacy and disintigration of Constitutional liberties brought on by whiney, liberal nanny-state do-gooders who think big government is needed to protect individuals from themselves.

I was riding in Frank's car, napping in the passenger seat when the cop pulled us over. I got ticketed for not wearing my seat belt. Seat belt, my ass... it's now an oppression belt! I say CLICK IT AND STICK IT!

by Frank Klaune November 21, 2004

in the hurt bag

To be in a great deal of pain.

Damn, when Frank was drunk, he slipped on the ice and hit his noggin on the cement. He was in the hurt bag for some time after that.

by Frank Klaune March 29, 2005

spreading joy

The phrase refers to the process of letting a massive amount of fart gas out in a carefully metered way- usually by farting silently while walking. In this manner, a disasterously huge amount of fart may be discretely dispensed over a larger geographical area. When faced with the prospect of needing to fart in a socially awkward situation, a person often resorts to initially letting a test fart. If the test fart indicates a vile, deadly amount of gas, the person may opt to walk (for example) from the punch bowl across the dance floor, and over to the bar- all the while silently farting the whole way. People at the punch bowl will begin vomiting, the dance floor will clear and the bar area patrons may begin to pass out. Meanwhile, the farter may actually be dozens of feet away, thus escaping blame. In such a way, the farter is said to be "spreading joy."

Damn, Frank is such an idiot. He farted over by the band and kept walking. He's spreading joy all over the wedding reception. How disgusting!

by Frank Klaune September 01, 2005