beer factor

A simple attempt to measure and quantify the amount of alcohol needed in order for you (or your friend) to willingly copulate with any given female. A fun game to play in a pub, the standard of measurement is one draw (draft) of an average strength American beer. While a reasonably attractive female may rate a 5-6 beer factor, a more homely specimen may require a 12 or 15 beer factor. On the other hand, a very attractive female may not warrant the need for any beer at all, resulting in the prized "ZBF" or "Zero Beer Factor".

Frank was scoping over some fat broad playing pool in the back room. She looked like a dyke to me. She was so fugly that she was probably a 24 beer factor.

by Frank Klaune January 23, 2005

choregasm

Sucessful completion of the sex act, but only after outrageously exhaustive efforts. Usually used to describe a rather un-satisfying sexual experience which one has been working very hard at achieving and, upon completion, does not think it was worth it.

"Lisa was playing hard to get. I had to take her out six times and spend a fortune on her to get laid, and then all she did was lay there and complain the wholetime. What a choregasm!"

by Frank Klaune November 22, 2003

Blatz splatz

This phrase, related in part to the "blat" (see "blat"), describes the logical aftermath of drinking too much Blatz beer. If one drinks far too much Blatz, the next morning's activities are dominated by the "Blatz splatz" in which bodily fluids are emitted from various orifices in a semi-involuntary spasm. This term is obviously only used in those areas of the country where "Blatz" beer is found. For additional information see "hershey squirts" and "the shits".

Man, Frank brought a few cases of Blatz to the stag party. Damn, the next day let me tell you, I had the Blatz splatz big time!

by Frank Klaune November 21, 2004

glued

Yet another term designating a high level of inebriation (drunkenness).

"Damn, after drinking that fifth with Grotee, Frank was really glued!"

by Frank Klaune March 15, 2004

chappies

An irritated or inflamed anal area. "The chappies" is a condition somewhat like hemorrhoids but on a more temporary basis. Chappies are usually caused by excessive ass wiping due to having the shits or by excessive moist farts causing a sore, irritated anal region.

"Damn, Frank's food was so greasy I had the shits all day. Now I've got the chappies so bad I can hardly sit down!"

by Frank Klaune March 06, 2004

cut to the fuck

Frat house phrase popularized by "The Degenerates" of 4th East ("Beast") Hall. "Cut to the fuck" was the battle cry used during the pathetic interludes and lame attempts at plot development inserted between sex scenes of a porn movie.

After the first couple finished they had a scene where John was talking to his friend in a coffee shop about his relationship with Amy and if his wife would mind. That crap in porn movies is so lame. CUT TO THE FUCK!

by Frank Klaune March 20, 2004

urban beautification

An oxymoron. Very simply stated.

Only a 800,000,000 megaton MIRV can bring about "urban beautification."

by Frank Klaune September 01, 2005