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Fotofly's definitions

Cockpittance

1.the ridiculously low salary that airline First Officers are paid.

2.the ridiculously small penis size of Airline Executives.
1. Our airline's policy states that your "cockpittance" (food stamps) are not be used at the grocery store while wearing your First Officer uniform (it makes the airline look cheap).

2. The Director of Operations at XYZ airlines was hung like a peanut, he was endowed with a mere "cockpittance" and treated pilots like crap to compensate.
by Fotofly November 26, 2010
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scanhandle

to systematically feel up a passenger in an airport, while pretending not to be a pervert.
Latisha, the T.S.A. agent, couldn't wait to get to work so she could "scanhandle" some fat women's breasts.
by Fotofly November 26, 2010
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pharmeffects

when pharmaceuticals produce side effects that are far worse than the affliction they supposedly are supposed to alleviate.
Moonesta, the sleep aid...Pharmeffects may include attraction to farm animals, cannibalism, zombie walk, uncontrollable drooling, anal bleeding, thoughts of suicide, and psychotic behavior. If death occurs, discontinue use.
by Fotofly November 26, 2010
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dotcomachameleon

1. one who purposely misrepresents themselves on the internet in order to mislead others into thinking they are worth getting to know.

2. a poseur
Online dating sites are full of dotcomachameleons. I really liked Bambi's profile, but when we met, SHE turned out to be fifty year old DUDE!
by Fotofly December 4, 2010
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Nascardio

1. a physical workout that consists of 500 reps of lifting a beercan, standing up, and yelling WOOOOOO!!! Performed every lap of a Nascar race when ones favorite driver passes by.
Every time the Summer's Eve car came around the track, Tammy stood up and yelled WOOOOO!, hoisting her tall boy beercan into the air, she was getting one hell of a Nascardio workout today!
by Fotofly November 30, 2010
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Beiber dam

1. a mob of brain dead teenagers lining up to see a Justin Beiber concert.

2. what most people say when Beiber's music comes on a nearby radio.
Beiber, dam... turn that crap off! Jesus!, look at that Beiber Dam over there at the fairgrounds.
by Fotofly November 30, 2010
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intercoma

1. an extremely long pause during a public announcement over an intercom, where the microphone is still keyed and making static noise, indicating a brain fart by the person making the announcement.
Bruce was very nervous on his first day as a stewardess. While making the the safety announcement, he slipped into an "intercoma" in the middle of explaining the oxygen masks.

For nearly thirty seconds, the microphone hissed in the passenger's ears until he regained his train of thought.
by Fotofly November 27, 2010
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