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Definitions by Foon J Cracker

Adjective defining a device or contraption that is extremely crude but effective; cave-man engineering.
Foon J. Cracker felt using a steam hammer to kill basement rats was very Grundar...but he couldn't argue with the results.
GRUNDAR by Foon J Cracker March 14, 2021

Mississippi Chocolate Rooster Tail 

Usually bestowed by drunken girlfriends riding upon the shoulders of their boyfriends at concerts while shouting "Wooooo!" with so much gusto that they momentarily lose the grip of their sphincter, releasing a torrent of the previous night's Taco Bell visit down the gentleman's back - much like a chocolate rooster tail.
" Yo - Charline gave Tommy a Mississippi Chocolate Rooster Tail at the Phish concert last night, Brah! Totally ruined his Ed Hardy tee, son!"

Wooden Puddin' 

Sperm; aka jizz, baby batter, man yogurt
Tina played with my love log until she got her reward; a mouth full o' wooden puddin'.
Wooden Puddin' by Foon J Cracker December 30, 2009

Porch Beef 

1. Crude meat derived from questionable origins, usually pungent and fetid in odor.

2. Slang for Penis

3. Slang for artificially augmented breasts.
Paris Hilton's underleg area reeks of porch beef.
Porch Beef by Foon J Cracker October 24, 2009