Definitions by Ephemily

Old Bae Seasoning 

A phrase for setting up the description your older lover's mood.

The Old Bae Seasoning at my house has been rather salty recently. Her sister's visit was supposed to be for just a weekend, and here it's Wednesday. They're driving each other crazy!

Old Bae Seasoning by Ephemily October 11, 2017

Bougie Blowie

An act of fellatio performed with a manual assist where the pinkies on the dominant hand remain in the culturally dictated "up" position.

She's so 1%, she even goes pinkies up when going down. Total bougie blowie queen.

Bougie Blowie by Ephemily October 11, 2017

Penrose Poppet 

The embodiment of qualities thought impossible to exist simultaneously in a single example of womanhood. An impossible figure. Believed to be mathematically impossible. Synonyms: Unicorn, Real Geek Girl, Waifu. Related to Escher Staircase, Blivet.

James has been dating a Penrose Poppet for about a month now and he's going to be severely disappointed when he discovers she's an actual human being and not a mythical creature after all.

Penrose Poppet by Ephemily October 10, 2017

Awethetic 

Awethetic: adj. A combination of awesome and pathetic. Most commonly used to describe something others may find lame or undesirable, but the subject is proud of.

eg "I had such an awethetic night last night. I got 14 hours of sleep and just might be ready for the day."

Awethetic by Ephemily June 24, 2014

cuntortionist 

A woman who uses her vagina or other orifices to hold sway over someone, or provide leverage that situations will play out in her favor.

She is such a cuntortionist. First it was withholding sex from her boyfriend because he didn't stop playing Skyrim the moment she told him to and now she's promising sex if he buys her that ridiculous car she wants.

cuntortionist by Ephemily December 30, 2013

Thuttocks

The area of the leg where the upper thigh and buttocks meet, but has little to no definition. It's like Cankles, only higher up on the leg.

I was an idiot and ran 2 miles on a treadmill when I can barely get from the couch to the fridge without wheezing. I think I pulled a muscle in my thuttocks.

Thuttocks by Ephemily January 17, 2013

Pit Tits 

Fat or flesh that can't be classified as back fat or actual breast tissue that hangs under the arms. They are the counterpart to Bingo Wings, the excess fat or sagging skin

on the upper arms. When not compressed by the bra of a band or other "foundation garment", excessive pit tits can prevent the owner from drawing their arms to their ides, giving them a sumo wrestler stance.

I wish it were possible to moosh my pit tits into the cups of my bra. Maybe then, I wouldn't need a wonderbra just to look proportionate.

Pit Tits by Ephemily January 10, 2013