Elburno's definitions

wanking like peter on the dole

Masturbating 11 times a day while sponging off society.

We all started wanking like peter on the dole when we saw the bottle of midleton.

it was like john just grew a badonkadonk.

by elburno March 8, 2008

Procrastination

The art of never getting up off your hole and doing things.

Enda indulges in excessive amounts of procrastination as well as masturbation.

by Elburno February 24, 2008

beat my cock like a ginger stepchild

Expression used to describe vigourous acts of masturbation with no regard for possible reprecussions such as friction burns or wanker's cramp.

Shlonglinator: I've got an awful horn. Think I'm going to head home and beat my cock like a ginger stepchild

Lads: You mean meeting gemma......

by Elburno September 20, 2009

the guinness skid mark on the underpants of society

Expression used to describe someone who is completely useless and black.

Jermaine Defoe is "the guinness skid mark on the underpants of society"

by Elburno March 2, 2008

Monkey in a person suit

A person of sub par intelligence, to the extent that you have to assume they are merely a non-hominoid simian who has somehow aquired a human shaped, halloween costume.

Paris Hilton is a monkey in a person suit. Hell you can see the zip.

by Elburno October 3, 2011