Eaton Holgoode's definitions

Corn Baby

A ripe, girthy turd birthed after a particularly overly starchy meal. Most commonly, excessive corn
consumption.

I had a blast at the fall corn festival this year. Roasting corn, kettle corn, corn fritters, corn relish, corn nuggets, you name it. I was obviously not alone enjoying the fall bounty because those portable shitters at the event were full of corn babies and I dropped my own corn baby right on top the blue water for the next person to admire.

by Eaton Holgoode October 4, 2018

Ass Stogie

A relatively slender, 5-7 inch long turd, brown in color.

Herschel: Hey dude, I will be right back.
Frances: Where ya going, Braaaa?
Herschel: I gotta hit the Head. I am about to pass an Ass Stogie.
Frances: Sweet! Snap it off clean.

by Eaton Holgoode June 24, 2009

Vagidictorian

A dude with the schlong so big pounds the top of the female cervix.

Roger is a vagidictorian. He beats my guts so hard my cervix is sore.

by Eaton Holgoode January 14, 2019

A Bad Rash

1. Euphemism used to describe and/or add emphasis as to how bad a situation may be.

2. A bad rash. Swelling and redness and I some cases itching and chaffing of the skin of an impacted area of the body.

My boss is like a bad rash. Always on my ass and driving me nuts.

I have a bad rash on my taint. I haven’t bathed for several days and it’s getting a tad itchy.

by Eaton Holgoode January 10, 2019

Flute Lessons

Leaning to suck a dick. Practice makes perfect.

Rachel is so hot but she needs some more flute lessons if this is ever gonna work out.

My girl is no cock monger. She needs some flute lessons. She’s all teeth.

by Eaton Holgoode December 10, 2018

Butter Skips

That greasy, warm buttery feeling between the butt cheeks when you skip to the bathroom for a wipe after sharting yourself.

Frank left this cubicle with the butter skips.

All that boiled cabbage last night gave me the butter skips today.

by Eaton Holgoode November 3, 2017

Fisherman’s Knob

A penis that has not been washed for days and after multiple sexual encounters with various women with questionable hygienic standards.

After being strung out for over two weeks, Carl finally sobered up to find his penis stuck to his inner thigh and the repugnant odor of a fisherman’s knob.

by Eaton Holgoode December 11, 2018