Eaton Holgoode's definitions

Dry Crack

To have anal sex without any lubricant.

Jordan loves anal sex and prefers to dry crack his girlfriend rather than lube up before entry.

by Eaton Holgoode July 4, 2009

Sarasota High Tea

When you skip out of work on an afternoon break and tea bag a homeless vagrant for $5 in beer money.

Carl you are late again from your afternoon break. This cannot continue.

I'm sorry. I had Sarasota High Tea this afternoon and it took a little longer than expected. The dude had no teeth so it felt really good.

Ok well that's a legitimate reason. I won't write you up.

by Eaton Holgoode December 28, 2015

Silk Sock

A smooth, non-ribbed condom.

She won’t let me do her unless I’m wearing a silk sock.

The silk sock feels for lifelike.

by Eaton Holgoode February 5, 2018

Squirt Cork After Burst

See squirt cork. The Squirt Cork After Burst occurs several hours after the initial release of the compacted turd. The after burst is the unanticipated, unexpected follow up liquid bowel blast that continues the assplosion after the initial release from the earlier squirt cork.

Leroy finally worked out the squirt cork that had been blocking him up and holding liquid feces in his bowels for days. After exploding diarrhea on the toilet for an hour, he thought he was finished. Four hours later, his brow started sweating and gut started wrenching. He immediately ran to the rest room and exploded a wet, soupy mess in the toilet with a Squirt Cork After Burst.

by Eaton Holgoode June 15, 2009

Plug and Tug

A male act of self-pleasure whereby a girthy object, I.e., a butt plug or dildo, is inserted into the rectum followed by a hardcore wank to orgasm. Known to stimulate the purple plum.

Every day after class, Roger would hurry back to his dorm for a quick plug and tug before his roomies got home.

by Eaton Holgoode November 9, 2015

Popped Clam

A gaping pussy. Typically, post coitus with an endowed partner or large sexual device. May also pop the clam from fisting.

Rachel got out her hand mirror to look at her gaping popped Clam after Tyrone beat her guts for over an hour.

by Eaton Holgoode March 5, 2019

Bake a Hot Loaf

To brew up and take massive shit.

I’m going to be late for work today cause imma bout to bake a hot loaf.

by Eaton Holgoode June 10, 2018