Eaton Holgoode's definitions
Last night he hit my ass and left me open.
He gave me an anal wake up this morning and left me open on the way to work.
He gave me an anal wake up this morning and left me open on the way to work.
by Eaton Holgoode June 11, 2018

When your girl sucks them balls and ball sack real good. Mouthing them up all slick and wet. Licking that chicken skin while she gives you a nice handy.
by Eaton Holgoode February 2, 2018

When you dive into a gorgeous ass on a hot chick, you know the one that's like an onion and makes ya wanna cry, but you end up encountering a smelly, sweaty, mung bunghole and you have no choice but to retreat.
Joe picked up a hot chick at the bar and took her home for some hot drunken sex. He went down to eat da booty but encountered a French Onion and after gagging asked her to go shower first.
by Eaton Holgoode November 24, 2015

Wonderfully, thick, round and pouty nipples on the female breasts. Coined Sirloin Nips due to their meaty similarity to delicious sirloin tips.
Stan: Hey Joe. How as your date with Rachel? Did you get any of that sweet poon last night?
Joe: Yea brahhhhhh! She was one tight box. But the best part was those Sirloin Nips of hers.
Stan: Oh yea brooooohh. Love em' meaty.
Joe: Yea brahhhhhh! She was one tight box. But the best part was those Sirloin Nips of hers.
Stan: Oh yea brooooohh. Love em' meaty.
by Eaton Holgoode September 29, 2015

A long, slender penis. Similar to a 6-7 inch section of garden hose. Thin Jimmy’s are ideal for anal sex due to limited girth.
Rachel loves anal now that she’s with a dude that packs a Thin Jimmy.
Rachel: My old boyfriend had a horse cock and left me anal gaping. But now that I’m with Carl, his Thin Jimmy is perfect and I snap right back shut.
Rachel: My old boyfriend had a horse cock and left me anal gaping. But now that I’m with Carl, his Thin Jimmy is perfect and I snap right back shut.
by Eaton Holgoode October 18, 2017

A vigorous hand job with two fisted pumping action delivering a climactic release of Albino Gravy aka jizz.
by Eaton Holgoode February 6, 2017

A common occurrence during the long cold winter months when your wife or girlfriend develops rough, dry, cracking skin on their hands and their would be otherwise, soft, supple hand are now like those of an elderly woman. The best part of the Winter Granny Handy is the stimulating roughness but more so while giving you a traditional, loving Handy or Hand Job one can secretly fantasize about getting a handy from your Grandma or some other geriatric.
Roger's wife had developed such dry skin hands from the dry winter weather that her hand jobs had become almost painfully rough. But Roger enjoyed too much the fantasy of getting the Winter Granny Handy.
by Eaton Holgoode February 19, 2015
