Eaton Holgoode's definitions

Pencil Cheese

Smegma. Penile cream cheese. Knob cheese. Dick cheese. Ripe and typically under the foreskin and around the bellend.

I pulled back my foreskin and spotted a motherload of pencil cheese.

by Eaton Holgoode December 7, 2018

Short Shooter

A male, with an aging prostate that still enjoys a good orgasm, but is unable to ejaculate with any distance and often only released in a dribbling manner or a short shot in the abdominal area.

Hank loved watching young males masturbate. He longed for being able to drop his oyster the distance they can. With age, his prostate had made his a short shooter and he is happy to just dribble when he cums.

by Eaton Holgoode May 1, 2015

Hot-Socking

Anal sex. Typically the rough and vigorous variety. May, but not always, result in a pink sock.

Rachel asked me to come over tonight. She says she needs some hot-socking.

Carla was prolapsed with a pink sock after I gave her a hot-socking to remember.

by Eaton Holgoode November 15, 2018

Rectal Digititus

An affliction whereby one is not sexually gratified during sexual activity without some form of digital (finger) stimulation of the rectum.

Rachel’s rectal digititus requires me to always shove my finger in her ass. I don’t mind.

I have to warn you, I have rectal digititus and will require insertion to at least the second knuckle to get off.

by Eaton Holgoode June 13, 2018

Grease Trumpet

When the ass is expelling some of the loudest, wettest sounding flatulence known to man.

Man I’m playing the grease trumpet today. I may have to go wipe.

by Eaton Holgoode January 14, 2019

Beef Twerp

Shitting a little bit on accident while farting in a bathtub.

I had just drawn a hot bath and was soaking my tired muscles when I did a beef twerp and a brown slick bubbled to the surface.

by Eaton Holgoode January 7, 2019

Chili Dribs

Streaks and stains and dribbles is stool in the gusset of a dude’s underwear from poor wiping or semi-loose stool and a little too much flatulence.

My wife said she’s done doing my laundry. Too many chili dribs.

Monday’s are rough after partying a weekend. I get the chili dribs at my desk.

My asshole was on fire this morning from the chili dribs.

by Eaton Holgoode October 15, 2018