A woman who seems to have a tendancy to soak up semen from all directions with no obvious limitation.
stop pestering, ive shagged you 15 times already and its nearly time for breakfast.. Go make me a full english you fucking sperm sponge..
by Drex Johnson September 18, 2008
The status of once proud and fearless gent of integrity who has lost his freedom and right to roam by submitting to the manipulations of a "ball bagger"..
This sad turn of events often happens to men in the prime of their lives, and could be a reaction to the stresses of "freedom" and the poor quality of casual pick-up material on offer these days..
Usually such specimens of men are rarely seen outside of the work environment or at family gatherings usually arranged by their miserable and deeply insecure female "owners". Any attempt to assert their previous rights to roam are met with histrionics, prolonged sulking, sex strikes and threats of "violence by proxy" often involving family members or friends of the ball bagger, the police, or family courts..
A ball bagged man is the butt of many jokes, as he lives in a form of comfortable castration rather like a neutered housepet.. But never has any real fun anymore, because his balls, are in "she who must be obeyed"'s handbag..
This sad turn of events often happens to men in the prime of their lives, and could be a reaction to the stresses of "freedom" and the poor quality of casual pick-up material on offer these days..
Usually such specimens of men are rarely seen outside of the work environment or at family gatherings usually arranged by their miserable and deeply insecure female "owners". Any attempt to assert their previous rights to roam are met with histrionics, prolonged sulking, sex strikes and threats of "violence by proxy" often involving family members or friends of the ball bagger, the police, or family courts..
A ball bagged man is the butt of many jokes, as he lives in a form of comfortable castration rather like a neutered housepet.. But never has any real fun anymore, because his balls, are in "she who must be obeyed"'s handbag..
Bill realised, as he looked in the mirror at a body that was once lean and athletic but now looks as sad and sorry as the heap of lard sulking on the sofa that had ball bagged him into this pathetic life, that he was not really able to escape now. The price would be too high and he didn't want to end up unable to see his child, even though that was what had trapped him in this situation in the first place..
by Drex Johnson July 22, 2011
A stupid slut that a non-committal guy uses for sex.
Also a dumb bloke used as a scratching post by a busy women when she gets an itch in her pants..
Also a dumb bloke used as a scratching post by a busy women when she gets an itch in her pants..
"I dumped her, she said she just wanted a fuck buddy, but I bet she'd be trying to get me to move in within a few weeks.. "
by Drex Johnson September 18, 2008
The clear fluid that dribbles from the eye of a gentlemans pleasure pole prior to the big unloading..
So called because it is similar in taste and consistency to the stuff that leaks out of Fido's nose..
Useful for lubricating the mammaries as you thrust the man-meat between them before giving madam a pearl necklace..
So called because it is similar in taste and consistency to the stuff that leaks out of Fido's nose..
Useful for lubricating the mammaries as you thrust the man-meat between them before giving madam a pearl necklace..
Madam: "Have you cum?"..
Sir: "Not yet darling.."
Madam: "Whats that mess on me tits then?"..
Sir: "That's just dog snot dear.. Tadpole soup will be delievered shortly..
Sir: "Not yet darling.."
Madam: "Whats that mess on me tits then?"..
Sir: "That's just dog snot dear.. Tadpole soup will be delievered shortly..
by Drex Johnson March 08, 2010
Internet connection, usually via laptop, personal computer.. Can be used to access services other than pr0n.. (Theoretically)..
John was just about to lose his mess when all of a sudden the faptop shut down and proceeded to install a much needed windows upgrade (sarcasm)..
His wankport now out of commission, John was forced to thumb through the NEXT catalogue ladies underwear section for emergency wrist fodder..
His wankport now out of commission, John was forced to thumb through the NEXT catalogue ladies underwear section for emergency wrist fodder..
by Drex Johnson August 23, 2013
A large juicy and succulent vagina with mouth-wateringly sweet pink and fleshy lips..
Not so appealing to vegans and vegetarians..
More a gourmet dish for the committed practicing Vaginarian..
Must be eaten fresh, or it rapidly becomes a musky mackerel, which is not quite so fresh, or even worse, a rancid pilchard..
Not so appealing to vegans and vegetarians..
More a gourmet dish for the committed practicing Vaginarian..
Must be eaten fresh, or it rapidly becomes a musky mackerel, which is not quite so fresh, or even worse, a rancid pilchard..
Big lady was a strange name for a woman who was only slightly above average height and was not really more weighty than the average western factory farm fed female.. (220lbs)..
But it became clear on webcam that her diet of cakes and lard had somehow enabled her to showcase a gutted salmon to her fans the likes of which is rare seen online and that a gent could definitely lose his head in when searching for his wrist watch in the morning after the pleasures of the night..
But it became clear on webcam that her diet of cakes and lard had somehow enabled her to showcase a gutted salmon to her fans the likes of which is rare seen online and that a gent could definitely lose his head in when searching for his wrist watch in the morning after the pleasures of the night..
by Drex Johnson October 18, 2016
A rough looking heavy-set dumpy whore who is unlikely to appeal to the average punter. Occasionally seen plodding the beat in red-light areas late on, looking desperate and dejected holding a carrier bag and with her over-sized dugs resting on her cannibal cooking pot sized belly half exposed..
Sir was on tour again last night and the streets were somewhat empty of prime stock.. However, a Grimsby trawler was seen moving slowly down the main drag and Richard wondered what her price might be..
Such an act would surely be considered a charitable deed, but alas, as he returned, his chances of having his bell chewed were negated as she was no longer apparent.. Some other sexual philanthropist had snaffled the beast..
Such an act would surely be considered a charitable deed, but alas, as he returned, his chances of having his bell chewed were negated as she was no longer apparent.. Some other sexual philanthropist had snaffled the beast..
by Drex Johnson October 28, 2019