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Drex Johnson's definitions

Grem

Rubbish skateboarder. Popular in the UK back in the 70's..
Gremtec Coyote skateboards .. Cheap little plastic planks often seen tictacking along the flat until the grems riding them realise the reason they cant handle the half pipe yet is because 360's are not everything and a wider board is more stable..
And most of all, they are still grems!
by Drex Johnson May 27, 2017
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wankport

Internet connection, usually via laptop, personal computer.. Can be used to access services other than pr0n.. (Theoretically)..
John was just about to lose his mess when all of a sudden the faptop shut down and proceeded to install a much needed windows upgrade (sarcasm)..

His wankport now out of commission, John was forced to thumb through the NEXT catalogue ladies underwear section for emergency wrist fodder..
by Drex Johnson August 25, 2013
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shinnie the wit

The Polite Spoonerist way of addressing Winnie The Pooh's father, the unforunately named Winnie The Shit..
Boy: "Daddy, why is Winnie the Pooh called Pooh?"

Daddy: "Because he is a little Sh.. Pooh!, but his father decided to change the family name to something less obviously turd related.. Not a particularly major change considering the fact that most folk still wonder if the name of "pooh" is in anyway related to the fact the perverted bear is naked from the waist down.."

Boy: "So, what was his father called?"..

Daddy: "erm, ... Shinnie the Wit?"
by Drex Johnson March 8, 2010
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fish rack

A row of women lined up for Sir's pleasure. Usually found in shandy rags, porn films, or Leicester City's changing rooms..

Very rarely encountered in real life, but I guess if a gent has a deep pocket the haddocks will oblige for the usual fee..

Taxi home and a bag of cheesy chips usually does it, but gents living outside of Wrexham may struggle to find willing victims easily..

Those in the Wrexham area are advised to keep the chip bags for putting over the heads of the specimens in order to "keep wood" while the procedure is being performed..
Richard was training hard on the sea-front throughout the summer season in Rhyl, ready for the Wrexham decathalon later in the year, where legends of the pork sword gather in an attempt to show their moves on the 10 haddock fish rack..
by Drex Johnson September 21, 2011
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Shag Dodger

A person who avoids their obligations in the bedroom (or any other place where sex can be expected to happen)..
Drex was most put out at the expectation that he should shaft Big Lady after she had made him another fine meal..

All he really wanted to do was go to sleep, but the thought of her labelling him a "Shag Dodger" in the morning was too depressing to contemplate so he reluctantly Rogered her brains out several times..
by Drex Johnson September 30, 2014
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Common Universal Natural Tendency

How to say "Cunt" without making it obvious..
I was going to ask my girlfriend if would be OK for me to spend an evening out on the town getting shitfaced with the lads, but the Common Universal Natural Tendency of a woman does not approve of a man enjoying himself without her being there..
by Drex Johnson September 30, 2014
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WRIMDITH

Acronym. Would Rather Insert My Dick In The Hoover..

Phrase often used by gents of integrity when discussing the Drex Rating of a target specimen..

Useful for bar room banter when ladies are present, especially "friends" of the beast are within earshot..

Of course, that means one may be asked to explain what it means..
Jack:- So then, Drex, would you slip it one?

Drex:- Wrimdith..

It's Friend:- What's that mean?

Drex:- Well, Rather Interesting. Most Desirable, I Truly Hope..

It's Friend:- Thats great, she has been after you for ages, I'll go tell her, she will be well chuffed..

Jack:- You're in luck Drex! Go for it!

It:- Hi Drex, Feeling lucky tonight?

Drex:- You look absolutely stunning tonight I have to say, and this kingsized boner I have for you is truly ready for the pleasures of the night.. But first of all, allow me to buy you a drink in the time honoured way of the true gentleman.. Just wait here a moment, I'll have to pop out to the car and get my wallet...
by Drex Johnson October 21, 2011
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