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Definitions by Dick Onchin

Purple War Helmet 

Yeah? Who dis?
This is Nancy. I need to talk to my daughter real quick.

Sorry there ma she all up in my junk right now and her mouf is full of purple war helmet.

My new cock ring is super tight and really gives me quite the purple war helmet.

I could feel his purple war helmet punching my cervix like a speedbag.
Purple War Helmet by Dick Onchin October 29, 2020

Fudge Pocket 

The anus. The asshole. The bunghole.
Damn it sure is cold out. My hands are freezing. You are welcome to warm it up in my fudge pocket.

My neighbor came over last night. We got a little drunk and the next thing I know I’m face down and panties down on the coffee table getting my fudge pocket stretched.
Fudge Pocket by Dick Onchin October 29, 2020

Blister Nips 

I need some udder cream I have a horrible case of the blister nips.

He was pulling on my nipple piercings so hard it gave me blister nips.

My dom got a little rough and was smacking my breasts with her riding crop. Those blister nips never felt so painfully good.
Blister Nips by Dick Onchin October 29, 2020

Moose Noose 

Daddy bent me over, put on a moose noose, and split my quivering sphincter.

The moose noose makes my cock engorged and rigid.

My homemade moose noose was too tight and my knob turned purple.
Moose Noose by Dick Onchin October 29, 2020

Sloppy Slapping

A reference to sex sounds. Usually the getting railed variety.
I couldn’t sleep with the camp counselor railing the new kid in the upper bunch. The sloppy slapping was just too much.

I walked in the house and could hear some sloppy slapping going on in the shower.
Sloppy Slapping by Dick Onchin October 29, 2020

Morning Trumpet 

Releasing exceptionally loud, melodic morning flatulence after gaseous build up during overnight slumber.
No need for an alarm clock, my roommate will wake the whole house playing the morning trumpet.

After a 2 am Taco Bell stop, I passed out and woke up blaring the morning trumpet.
Morning Trumpet by Dick Onchin October 29, 2020

Texas Coffee Break

Slipping into the bathroom for a quick wank or bean flick while at work and on the clock.
I got so horny sitting at my desk I had to take a Texas coffee break.

Don’t use the head around 10 am because every stall is full of dudes on a Texas coffee break.

My explosive diarrhea episode quickly turned in to a Texas coffee break and I flicked a squirt from my engorged bean.
Texas Coffee Break by Dick Onchin October 29, 2020