Jesus Hole

1. The hole in Jesus' side or hand when used for sexual pleasure. See crucifuck.
2. Texas Governor Rick Perry's nickname for his Prison Wallet.
Rick Santorum was so horny he was obsessed with getting him some Jesus Hole (a crucifuck). Unfortunately, Jesus had been MIA for 2000 years and Santorum had to go off to the bathhouse for some pussy on a stick. Having left his Mormon Panty Liners at home he left with a Mormon Trail of santorum in his Mormon Underwear.
by Cuntoleezza Rice August 23, 2011
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prison wallet

The anal cavity of an inmate, so named for its ability to smuggle valuables into a prision or stash them for safe keeping. Due to "recreational activity" prisoners often leave with a larger prison wallets than when they arrive.
Prison life bound to be dull, but due to years of fisting the convict managed to bring 3 kilos of smack and a boombox in his prison wallet.
by Cuntoleezza Rice February 01, 2007
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Great Whore

1. An especially skilled prostitute.
2. The Catholic Church as defined by fucktard Fundamentalist Christian evangelist John Hagee
John Hagee obviously doesn’t know the difference between a great whore and a bunch of kid diddlers. Maybe he should wake up and pull the straw out of Fred Phelch’s ass.
by Cuntoleezza Rice May 18, 2008
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tampon tea

Tea made from a used tampon, as depicted in Catherine Breillat's 2004 film, Anatomy of Hell.
"This might go better with some crumpets", he exclaimed as he sipped the tampon tea.
by Cuntoleezza Rice February 01, 2007
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penigraph

1. A photo of a penis posted on the Internet. These are often found in personal profiles on gay dating sites.

2. A phonograph without a tonearm used by VERY poorly endowed men.

1. The evangelist was compelled to contact the escort after viewing his penigraph on the Web.

2. The needle dicked bug fucker placed the disk on the penigraph and placed his member in the groove.
by Cuntoleezza Rice January 27, 2007
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John Hagee

A Fundamentalist Christian evangelist fucktard and supporter of presidential candidate John McCain. Like Baptist preacher Fred Phelch, Hagee believes hurricane Katrina was caused by God’s wrath about gays in New Orleans. Hagee also called Catholic Church the Great Whore of the Apocalypse, although we all know they’re just a fraternity of kid diddlers.
John Hagee wouldn’t know what a great whore was if he was sitting on her face.
by Cuntoleezza Rice May 18, 2008
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Captain Poopypants

A female astronaut who traveled 950 miles wearing a diaper to attack the "other woman" in a love triangle.
CAPTAIN: Keep your hands off him bitch!
VICTIM: Yuck, what's that smell? You must be Captain Poopypants.
by Cuntoleezza Rice February 08, 2007
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