16 definitions by Colonel Barnaby
This is a reference - used by mothers- to refer to the common periwinkle (a type of shellfish, resembling a small snail, and commonly found on shores in the northern hemisphere) and how much the contents of the shell resemble a little boys penis.
by Colonel Barnaby January 19, 2023
This is a term of derision, commonly used by people of the lower-classes. It refers to the act of self-abuse, or self-stimulation of the sexual organs, by both male and female sexes. It was particularly frowned upon during the Victorian era, when it was thought that the act of self-abuse could lead to blindness or even the madhouse. The person manipulating his or her loins in order to achieve sexual solace would therefore be the ‘wanker’. However, today it is more often used to signify a person is dim-witted or has an unsavoury character.
“That copper was a right wanker! He stopped me for speeding’ in me car and now I’m gettin’ a fine an’ points on me licence!”
by Colonel Barnaby February 10, 2023
This term is defined as the act of manual stimulation to the loins of a willing male - either by another male or a female. The loins of the male are stroked in a rhythmical fashion ; often from behind so as to resemble the milking of a bovine by a milking maiden. This results in a very pleasurable seminal emission by the male, usually captured in a tissue or some other receptacle.
‘Harold loves it when Maude has a go at cock milking. It gives him instant relief and means she can’t get pregnant!’
by Colonel Barnaby January 22, 2023
Minge is a colloquial English term referring to a female’s pubic hair. Monger refers to any trading enterprise. A minge-monger is therefore a term of abuse used to describe a person who it is claimed sells the pubic hair of a ladies.
by Colonel Barnaby November 28, 2022
A disgraceful practise where a woman or an inverted man willingly engages in oral intercourse. This sexual act induces incredible sexual pleasure upon the male, with the added value that it cannot lead to pregnancy. This has, sadly, become incredibly popular amongst young people from all classes of society. However, one must also be aware that it can also be used as simply a term of abuse and nothing more.
‘Nellie called me a ‘cocksucker’ because she found out I was dating Florrie from the pickle factory!’
by Colonel Barnaby January 23, 2023
A definition of a young man who sees himself as being superior to those of older rank. It refers to the young male as someone who was a mere bubble of ejeculate when older, superior males were forging their way in the world. It is a term of derision and resentment upon the youth of today, who see going to the toilet and eating as their sole achievements in life.
‘So, you think that you know it all! When I was fighting in the army you were nothing more than a spunk bubble, you worthless, drug-crazed , chromium-plated retard!’
by Colonel Barnaby January 23, 2023
When a normal man is unable to obtain a stirring of the loins when confronted with an attractive young lady. This is sadly common. It is often associated with old age or prostrate difficulties. It produces extreme melancholia in the male; a feeling of worthlessness, of being unable to satisfy a woman, which - in extreme cases - can lead to suicide.
by Colonel Barnaby January 23, 2023