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Chris Norton's definitions

how many bags would it take?

n.
a game in which the players mention the name of a person followed by "how many bags would it take?" meaning how many times a bag over the head would be needed to make that person doable.
Len: Roselyn Sanchez, how many bags would it take?
Chris: Ummmmmm, zero obviously!! Sarah Palin, how many bags would it take?
Len: Nice one, I'd think two bags. Misty May, how many bags would it take?
Chris: Good comeback, I'd give her five but cause she's got a nice bod I'll make it three.
by Chris Norton February 19, 2009
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Hose monster

n.
a promiscuous woman who is dangerous to date long-term or marry because she has extreme emotional baggage and a first-class attitude.
Men, beware of these hose monsters who look pretty now because you'll regret it later when you marry her.
by Chris Norton January 10, 2007
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bullpen

in dating, this is a lineup of associates who specialize in your tastes. as in baseball the manager needs a starting pitcher, middle reliever and a closer. in dating, some people various have fetishes and tastes. a bullpen satisfies an individual's various sexual needs. a bullpen is also a good way to keep a man from becoming pussywhipped.
tom leykis tells all his sons avoid girlfriends and instead to keep a bullpen. he's a smart guy who knows everything men need to know in order to get laid.

Tom: Sometimes I'm a chubby chaser, sometimes I like asians, and sometimes I like MILFs. My bullpen has these types along with the hotties.
by Chris Norton February 6, 2009
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Mrs. Robinson

an older woman who pursues men in their late teens and early twenties for sex.
My job is full of Mrs. Robinsons. Most of the women are at least twenty years older than me and they're the only ones hitting on me.
by Chris Norton October 1, 2008
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multi-bagger

n.
an unattractive woman who men would say needs more than three bags to cover her face.
I've actually slept with a few two baggers and three baggers but because these girls were wearing Frederick's of Hollywood lingirie, I've even slept with a multi-bagger once.
by Chris Norton January 19, 2007
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Fat Damon

an insult towards fat people. the humor of the term gets its punch because it rhymes with actor Matt Damon.
Doug: Carrie! You ARE abusive towards me! You make fun of my weight all the time!

Carrie: I do not!

Doug: Oh yeah? What about the time you called me Fat Damon? That was five minutes ago!!
by Chris Norton February 24, 2009
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spank bank directory

n.
long term memory bank of a person's favorite sexually stimulating memories with some fair internal organization for the individual to regularly consult for sexual self-stimulation when needed.
Since I was old enough, my spank bank directory contains almost all my memories of panty & thong sightings even dating back to the earliest days I've learned to wank and I still continue to use them to this day.
by Chris Norton January 18, 2007
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