Chipleader Hero's definitions

An Elf

Going to great lengths to state a point with gusto, barely checked facts and annoying repetition, only to volte face at first sign of opposition

Edwina claimed a big win at Cheltenham but as usual couldn’t back it up. What an elf.

by Chipleader Hero March 17, 2021

Global Architect

The retard at work who thinks she knows better than everyone else and no one can get along with and is made to work from home.

Have you seen that ugly new bird Edwina? She's a right pain in the arse. Going to make her the office's global architect.

by Chipleader Hero March 17, 2021

Waterfoot

The capital of swinging in the Glens. Home to the largest fish arsehole factory and landfill site in Western Europe.

Have you seen Edwina?
No, she gone swinging in Waterfoot.

by Chipleader Hero March 17, 2021

Brigadier

“Real power is something you take” Jock Ewing once said to Bobby. And thus, becoming a brigadier is a rite of passage only the most ruthless can aspire to.

Some say becoming a brigadier is like winning a game of low, others say it’s just luck. In some parts of Belfast there are as many as one brigadier to every ten windows.

Often sought by the police, only a fool would confirm his identity.

Policeman-is that man dancing like a chicken the brigadier

Edwina-yes

by Chipleader Hero March 18, 2021

Poor

Reply given to argument when it has gone over your head, or you can't make a decent response.

Edwina couldn't argue with the real chipleader, so she just typed poor and went back to her cave to tarmac the little elf.

by Chipleader Hero March 18, 2021

Chipleader

You can’t become a chipleader, you are born as one. Found only in designated beauty spots like Carrick and Killinchy, it’s traditional to bow, clap and cartwheel when you are in their presence. Always address the chipleader with a Hail hail!! when you are graced with their presence (not to be confused with Heil when you meet Edwina).

Edwina-Hail hail!! can I become a chipleader?

Chipleader-no

by Chipleader Hero March 19, 2021

Loserwok

An individual that should be pitied rather than scorned. Found mainly around Waterfoot and Bangor Bus Station, they consistently fail to perform against their betters.

Their hobbies include emu worrying and watching old Jim’ll Fix It re-runs.

Shauna-did you lose again tonight?
Edwina-yes
Shauna-what a loserwok

by Chipleader Hero March 19, 2021