Chad Baker's definitions

black pearl

1. noun, a fart that barely seems like fart at all, is silent, but smells like the gut dumpster behind a slaughterhouse on a hot summer's day after someone has already given you a dirty sanchez. The farter often barely recognizes that he/she has released a black pearl until they themselves are caught up in its swath of destruction. The black pearl also refers to the apparent tiny volume that the fart occupies. 1cc of black pearl gas is roughly equivalent to an equal volume of VX nerve gas in the amount of panic and terror it can create.

1. I was in a meeting today and thought I'd let a little one slip, but I totally forgot about the onion rings I had the night before...bad move, total black pearl. There was a box with my name on it when I got back to my desk.

by Chad Baker May 28, 2006

Qapla'

1. literally "success" in the Klingon language from the TV series Star Trek, often used as an exclamation.
2. a farewell, equivalent to "good luck" or "may you be successful" spoken upon parting company

1. Qapla'! I've found my car keys at last!
2. I'm sorry to see you go, but I wish you the best. Qapla'!

by Chad Baker April 3, 2006

soooo

Identical to the English word "so", except with extra O's added for extra emphasis. Often used when waiting for a response, or when intensifying an adjective.

Soooo...did you get my last IM or what?
This movie is soooo boring!

by Chad Baker September 23, 2005

hossome

adj; 1. a man who is hot, big and furry. 2: resembling Hoss on Bonanza

Those guys in American Bear magazine are hossome!

by Chad Baker January 11, 2005

crisscross applesauce

the act of urinating in a manner such that two (or more) streams of urine intersect, thereby creating a frothy churning yellow swirl in the water which resembles applesauce

Billy and Bobby both had to pee really bad, so rather than each taking their turn, they decided to crisscross applesauce.

by Chad Baker May 12, 2004

catblock

-ed, -ing
The inability to perform a task because doing so would involve moving a contented cat.

My wife and I wanted to go out for breakfast but Rover had us catblocked.
We were trying to use the laptop, but Mr. McMittens was catblocking.

by Chad Baker December 28, 2007

swordfight

1. the act of two (or more) persons rubbing their penises against one another

also:

2. two men urinating at the same time and place, with an implication that they are participating in 1.

1. The gay porn video featured a lot of fellatio, tons of anal sex, and a few swordfights.

2. I'd like to finish this game of pool when John and Jeff get back from their swordfight.

by Chad Baker May 13, 2004