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Cap'n Bullmoose's definitions

arse bandit

A turd burglar. A corn holer. A poofter. A fag. A sissy boy. A swish.
Bruce is an arse bandit. He enjoys eating butt for desert.
by Cap'n Bullmoose October 9, 2007
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liberal

A politician who promises entitlements to certain groups in order to buy their votes. Note that the politician therefore wants those groups to remain static, so he can promise more entitlements and get more votes.

A liberal has no desire to see black, Mexican, or poofter populations leave their ghettos, barrios, or prance halls and blend in with the rest of society. If they did that, there would be no easy block of votes.

Liberals have no desire to see blacks or Mexicans get good paying jobs. With a good job comes the liberal's enormous burden of taxes, which soon wipe out your entitlements.

In short, a liberal is most interested in preserving the status quo, by keeping black folk down on de ol plantation.
Senaturd Kennedy is a pansy ass liberal.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 19, 2005
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flong your dong

If you would like to flong your dong with a group of liberal gentlemen, go play circle jerk with some simpering fags. They love to beat their puds together on the street corner.
by Cap'n Bullmoose November 22, 2007
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homosexual

An extremely offensive word used to villify a poofter, a butt eating faggot, a turd burglar, a corn holer, or a swishy mama's boy.
A person is not born a homosexual. He is not born eating butt or corn holing the dog. A person chooses to become a homosexual. Behavior makes a person a homosexual. You do not become a homosexual by eating chocolate cake. You become a homosexual by eating butt.
Lemony is a homosexual. He enjoys fluttering his wrists, lisping, and going "tsk!" He decided to become a homosexual the day he decided to corn hole the dog.
by Cap'n Bullmoose October 27, 2007
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wino lunch box

A dumpster. A large trash receptacle usually found outside business establishments. A bin in which winos and bums go dumpster diving.
Edgar and Louise found breakfast in the wino lunch box behind Maxim's.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 20, 2005
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commode

Hey, Janet, don't forget to flush the commode.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 23, 2005
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beer

A beverage that cannot be purchased; only rented.
You can't buy beer. You can only rent it.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 20, 2005
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