Cap'n Bullmoose's definitions

Cling

What working stiffs do to their guns and their religion. We know this is true because that limp-wristed liberal stove lid, Barack O'Bama, AKA the Irish Jig, told us so.

That Irish Jig O'Bama says we working stiffs cling to our guns and our religion because we are too stupid and ignorant to be limp-wristed liberals. Actually, we cling to our guns and our religion because we are too smart to be limp-wristed liberals.

I'm not going to that dumb-ass liberal meeting. They won't let me cling to my gun in there.

by Cap'n Bullmoose April 19, 2008

columbus day

A holiday celebrated by Italians in all major US cities. In Denver, white liberals whine and fuss, claiming the celebration is racist and genocidal.

Very strangely, in San Francisco, the white liberals don't dare to interfere with the Italians.

Let's go march in the Columbus Day parade and offend a legion of white liberals!

by Cap'n Bullmoose May 14, 2005

slop swab

A napkin or serviette, used to wipe crumbs and gravy from your mouth at dinner.

Otto wiped his chops with a slob swab.

by Cap'n Bullmoose April 23, 2005

spade cat

An African American man.

This word was common among jazz musicians in the 1940s and 1950s, but fell out of favor in recent times because of politically correct bull. This was never a racial slur, although politically correct twits think it is today.

The spade cat lay down a great riff during his sax solo.

by Cap'n Bullmoose April 19, 2005

trots

Loose bowels. The drizzy shits.

Braughton got the trots at her office this morning and didn't make it to the can.

by Cap'n Bullmoose April 30, 2005

Public Transportation

A means of urban transportation used mainly by the underprivileged and the working poor

Public Transportation in many cities is a rolling crime wave. Muggers, Crips, Bloods, Pachucos, Hip Hop assholes, Gangstas, A-Rabs, and other criminals ride public transportation with their ghetto blasters blaring. They challenge honest working stiffs, force them to stand, steal their money, and make them listen to evil Hip Hop "music."

by Cap'n Bullmoose October 9, 2007

Brooklyn Assault Rifle

A Winchester model 1894 .30-30 rifle. This definition was created by the late Colonel Jeff Cooper.

Pansy ass liberals wring their hands and whine about "assault rifles," which, they say, are the favorite weapon of the Crips, the Bloods, and the Pachucos. A pansy ass liberal calls any black, ugly, semiautomatic rifle an assault rifle, which is like calling any black, ugly cat a dog. To keep from getting their pansy asses kicked, many liberals say they don't want to outlaw hunting or legitimate hunting rifles. Virtually all of those liberals will agree that a Winchester 1894 .30-30 is a hunting rifle. So there you have it: A wonderful, fast-shooting, accurate rifle just right for blasting Crips, Bloods, and Pachucos in defense of your home, your family, and yourself. This is the Brooklyn Assault Rifle. Get one today and start cleaning up your neighborhood while fooling your local pansy ass liberals.

Semiautomatic rifles will shoot faster than a Brooklyn Assault Rifle. But your .30-30 is far more accurate. With practice, you can shoot a Winchester 94 with great speed and accuracy.

You'll be able to keep your Brooklyn Assault Rifle after president O'Bama, the Irish Jig, confiscates all your handguns to keep you from hurting yourself when Pachucos invade your home.

by Cap'n Bullmoose July 3, 2008