Definitions by Bob Velvetta

Theory of Economic Ejaculation 

You know the economy is going to cum back, but you don't know when, and you don't know where it might go.

Helen told her boyfriend that his orgasms were so inconsistent, he should be studying the Theory of Economic Ejaculation.

Theory of Economic Ejaculation by Bob Velvetta April 6, 2020

Clusterphobic 

Fear of a clusterfuck

Having endured so many fuck ups, Bob has become clusterphobic.

Clusterphobic by Bob Velvetta November 24, 2018

junk warmer 

Insulated underwear

It was so cold, I was sure glad I was wearing a junk warmer.

junk warmer by Bob Velvetta June 29, 2017

nose missile 

When a snot projectile is ejected as a result of sneezing.

Brad's nose missile barely missed hitting Rita's blouse.

nose missile by Bob Velvetta June 11, 2017

jizmeister 

Sperm Donor

Brad has been making some extra money as a jizmeister.

jizmeister by Bob Velvetta June 9, 2017

scrotumed 

Getting hit so hard in the nut sack that you don't have the words to describe the pain.

We knew Carl had been scrotumed when he doubled over and could not draw a breath to tell us where it hurt.

scrotumed by Bob Velvetta June 1, 2017

lowcountry crapper 

A rocking chair with a hole in the seat for a quick discharge, located on the porch of a house in the lowcountry of South Carolina.

Uncle Bob had to go so bad, it's a good thing he was sitting in the lowcountry crapper.

lowcountry crapper by Bob Velvetta May 18, 2017