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Adapted from the episode of Seinfeld; "The Strike". It must take place between any holiday period. However, it is much preferred to coincide with the December to February holiday atmosphere.
The Festivus consists of "The Airing of Grievances" and the "Feats of Strength". However, in accordance with the official Brisbane-Adelaide agreement “The Airing of Grievances” will be now known as “The Time of Crap Speeches” and “Feats of Strength” will be now known as “Crushing Booze”.
There is an icon known as “The Festivus Pole”. It must be in the form of a microphone stand. It should be tall, golden, long and skinny. The microphone must be broken by the end of Festivus, during intoxicated karaoke sessions.
In the beginning there was Festivus One. It was held in Brisbane in February 2003 and, behold, it was very good. The second Festivus was held in December 2003 in Adelaide and there was light.
And on the seventh day of each Festivus sanctuary will be given to those who have gone without sleep and without walking in a straight line. And he shall rest on the seventh day from all his sauce which he has hacked.
Finally, each day you pass in between each Festivus must be spent spreading forth the good word of Festivus and the adventures that were had.
The Festivus consists of "The Airing of Grievances" and the "Feats of Strength". However, in accordance with the official Brisbane-Adelaide agreement “The Airing of Grievances” will be now known as “The Time of Crap Speeches” and “Feats of Strength” will be now known as “Crushing Booze”.
There is an icon known as “The Festivus Pole”. It must be in the form of a microphone stand. It should be tall, golden, long and skinny. The microphone must be broken by the end of Festivus, during intoxicated karaoke sessions.
In the beginning there was Festivus One. It was held in Brisbane in February 2003 and, behold, it was very good. The second Festivus was held in December 2003 in Adelaide and there was light.
And on the seventh day of each Festivus sanctuary will be given to those who have gone without sleep and without walking in a straight line. And he shall rest on the seventh day from all his sauce which he has hacked.
Finally, each day you pass in between each Festivus must be spent spreading forth the good word of Festivus and the adventures that were had.
"A Festivus, For the Rest of Us!" - Frank Costanza
by Alex December 22, 2003
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