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Alana Post's definitions

defecult's pendulum

Function: noun

Etymology: Play on the famously abstruse novel Foucault's Pendulum by Umberto Eco and its title's source, Jean Bernard Leon Foucault's pendulum, a simple pendulum suspended from a long wire and set into motion along a meridian. The plane of motion appears to turn clockwise in the Northern Hemisphere and counterclockwise in the Southern Hemisphere, demonstrating the axial rotation of the earth.

1. the moment of not knowing if poops are dangling or not after a sphincter-numbing bowl movement 2. confusion when the whirl of toilet flush snatches a still-dangling poop from one's anal. See also: defecult.
(BOB EXITS THE BATHROOM)
Sally: How'd it go in there? Defecult?
Bob: God, no. It was even worse this time... more like Defecult's Pendulum.
by Alana Post July 26, 2008
mugGet the defecult's pendulummug.

Debbie Downer

Etymology: From the Saturday Night Live character Debbie Downer, played by Rachel Dratch

Function: Noun

1. a: a person who says something terribly depressing (a downer), typically only tangentially related to the present circumstance or topic of conversation, and thereby destroys the positive atmosphere. b: a statement that is charactaristic of Debbie Downer

Usage note: In the skit, following each downer Debbie voices, a trombone plays a "wah waaah" (sad trombone) sound effect and the camera zooms in on Debbie Downer's face, which is twisted in comic despair.
Debbie Downer: Hey, does anyone have a banana?

Friend #1: What?

Debbie Downer: Well, if I don't get enough potassium every day, I awaken in the middle of the night by crippling leg cramps.

(higher-pitched wah wahhhhhhh; zoom in)

(everyone looks pissed off)

Debbie Downer: By the way, it's official -- they've located my birth mother. Deceased.

(deeper wah wahhhhhhhh; zoom in on a particularly painful facial expression)
by Alana Post September 30, 2005
mugGet the Debbie Downermug.

sad trombone

Function: noun

1. Describes the sound made by a trombone to illustrate a depressing statement, action, or moment. "Wah waah". Pioneered on the SNL skit Debbie Downer.
Tad: Bjorn, did you show Nell those pictures of your new kitten?
Bjorn: I don't think so. Nell, would you like to see the pictures I have of Sir Fluffles?
Nell: Oh, Bjorn, I can't bear to look at pictures of cats -- they only make me think of watching my own Mr. Snowflake waste away due to the effects of Feline Leukemia.
Tad: Wow... sad trombone!
by Alana Post September 30, 2005
mugGet the sad trombonemug.

shemergency

an unfortunate occurance that is both uniquely feminine in nature and very urgent.
Janice, cover for me! I'm having a shemergency and need to buy some tampons and Shout wipes ASAP!
by Alana Post September 11, 2005
mugGet the shemergencymug.

carolineism

function: noun
etymology: Eponym after Caroline Contillo who has achieved questionable local fame for coining words and phrases that surprisingly get incorporated into common New York parlance

1. a term coined by or popularized by Caroline Contillo
some carolineisms currently listed on urbandictionary.com are: sad trombone, Debbie Downer, and take a real one. also of note: to be "h".
by Alana Post April 24, 2006
mugGet the carolineismmug.

shanus

Function: Noun
Etymology: Portmanteau of shame and anus.

1. a: Judging the anus to be obscene b: the susceptibility to such feelings.

It came about as a result of the anus being photoshopped out of many images of female nudes across the internet, and the lasting psychological damage it caused on the women thus depicted.
The shanus Suicide Girls models must feel right now must be palpable; how awful to be buttholed by both their own website and the FBI.
by Alana Post September 30, 2005
mugGet the shanusmug.

defecult

Function: adjective

Etymology: combination of difficult and fecal. Attribution: Ben.

1. describes the difficulty associated with taking an extremely constipated shit, or anything of equivalent difficulty. See also: tenesmus; defecult's pendulum.
(BOB EXITS THE BATHROOM)
Susan: So how'd it go in there?
Bob: Defecult.
by Alana Post October 14, 2005
mugGet the defecultmug.

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