Definitions by AKACroatalin
Shit Warmed Over
English slang which can mean feeling poorly or can describe something as useless or unfit for purpose. So if someone says they feel like shit warmed it means they are feeling extremely unwell or under the weather. But if it is their opinion of a device, person or product, it means that the device, person or product is a total WOFS.
Shit Warmed Over by AKACroatalin August 19, 2016
Malcolm’s Law
Very similar to Murphy’s Law or Sod’s Law, but with one important difference. Instead of “if something can go wrong it will do”, it now becomes ”with a Malcolm on the project it won’t just go wrong, but it will go wrong in the worst possible way.” See also Finagle’s Law.
“It’s a total disaster; there is no way that it could possibly have happened!”
“With that Heale Malcolm involved what did you expect? It’s Malcolm’s Law, mate.”
“With that Heale Malcolm involved what did you expect? It’s Malcolm’s Law, mate.”
Malcolm’s Law by AKACroatalin August 17, 2016
Cyber Aggression
Cyber aggression is aggression between individuals that occurs online, usually a one-off occurrence or at most happens only occasionally. Interestingly, when it happens, the aggressor has no power over the target of the aggression or there is no intention to cause harm or distress to the target of the aggression, which possibly explains the frequently heard advice “Don’t tweet when you’re pissed.”
In some cases, however, cyber aggression is rather more sinister, when an individual used an online relationship to deliberately intimidate, emotionally harm, manipulate or exercise power over another person when online.
In some cases, however, cyber aggression is rather more sinister, when an individual used an online relationship to deliberately intimidate, emotionally harm, manipulate or exercise power over another person when online.
Cyber aggression is becoming more frequent as more people go online, could this be another form of culture clash, or is it just because some people are nasty, shitty bastards?
Cyber Aggression by AKACroatalin August 17, 2016
Traffic Jam
This is sometimes found in supermarkets where someone, usually female, with an arse so enormous it makes the average two-seater look small, shoving a trolley piled high with junk food, suddenly stops. This may be because she’s suddenly gone AWTF or it could be because she’s trying to decide whether to have ten or twelve krispy kremes to help her recover from all this strenuous shopping. She blocks the aisle, traffic builds up behind and in front of her, the fat cow is deaf to polite requests to move or even, “Get out of the way you fucking mammoth!” The result is gridlock and it usually takes half an hour and several members of staff to get things sorted out. See also Road Block.
“I was shopping in ASDA and got caught in a traffic jam.”
“What did you do?”
“Dumped the trolley and went to TESCO.”
“What did you do?”
“Dumped the trolley and went to TESCO.”
Traffic Jam by AKACroatalin August 15, 2016
An online forum originally intended for professional people to form links with others that they know and trust professionally in order to further their own and their company’s business interests. LinkedIn was co-founded by Reid Hoffman who was previously Executive Vice President in charge of business and corporate development for PayPal and was launched in 2003. Unfortunately, like so many other things (Urban Dictionary for example), it has been overrun by talentless, self-aggrandising wannabes who have nothing to offer the workplace except copious quantities of bullshit.
Interestingly, Hoffman stated that 27 percent of LinkedIn subscribers are recruiters; perhaps this would explain why using recruiters to solve a staffing problem is usually a complete disaster, they’re so full of their own bullshit they believe everyone else’s.
Interestingly, Hoffman stated that 27 percent of LinkedIn subscribers are recruiters; perhaps this would explain why using recruiters to solve a staffing problem is usually a complete disaster, they’re so full of their own bullshit they believe everyone else’s.
“Have you heard that Malcolm has put up a profile on LinkedIn? Delusions of grandeur or what!”
“Delusions of grandeur? That fuckwit Heale shouldn’t even have delusions of adequacy!”
“Delusions of grandeur? That fuckwit Heale shouldn’t even have delusions of adequacy!”
LinkedIn by AKACroatalin August 15, 2016
Wouldn’t touch it with a barge pole
Wouldn’t touch it with a bargepole is an expression indicating extreme dislike and distaste for an object, person or situation. The expression can be used in a similar way to wouldn’t touch her with a 10 foot pole, but is not solely applicable to females; it is even more disparaging when used about a female as it treats her as something less than human. Many bargepoles were 12 or 13 feet long, but one specialised type called a setting boom could be as long as 28 feet! So as you can imagine, wouldn’t touch it with a barge pole means something which you would much rather keep well away from.
Wouldn’t touch it with a barge pole by AKACroatalin August 15, 2016
OIC
This was a term that originated within the British Army, probably in the nineteenth century, to describe an unpleasant, ignorant, useless person. Although now usually spelled oik, the original spelling was an acronym standing for Obnoxious Ignorant Cunt except when applied to junior officers (ruperts) when it became Obnoxious Idiotic Cunt.
“They’ve put Malcolm in charge of the team-building weekend!”
“That OIC! Fuck it, I ain’t going! It’ll just be another chance for that fat fuck to kiss up kick down.”
“That OIC! Fuck it, I ain’t going! It’ll just be another chance for that fat fuck to kiss up kick down.”
OIC by AKACroatalin August 14, 2016