There are lots of fart jokes, but this one holds a record, it’s around 4000 years old and is the oldest known joke. It's an ancient Sumerian proverb that says, "Something which has never occurred since time immemorial; a young woman who did not fart in her husband's lap.”
by AKACroatalin October 27, 2019
Get the Fart Fact 7 mug.This is not solely applicable to blokes, females can also get a second asshole, so feminists eat your fucking hearts out. The phrase originated in the UK where it was usually “ripped him a second arsehole” but over time the spelling changed. The original meaning was to attack someone, usually unexpectedly, brutally and viciously so that they were completely overwhelmed and unable to defend themselves. It can also mean to criticise someone’s thoughts, ideas or lifestyle either with or without cause or justification. The usually accepted definition is that which is applied to the workplace where it means to reprimand someone so totally and effectively, that the person on th receiving end wishes they could crawl under the carpet and die. So if you have ripped him/her a second asshole you have delivered a rebuke of epic proportions.
That WOFS Malcolm has fucked up once too often so the boss called him in and ripped him a second asshole. He practically crawled out afterwards looking like he’d pissed himself and cleared his desk.
by AKACroatalin December 06, 2016
Get the Ripped him a second asshole mug.The condition of having no civilizing influences or refined culture; ignorance or crudity; savage violence or cruelty.
by AKACroatalin April 13, 2015
Get the Barbarism mug.Likeable is an adjective meaning pleasant or attractive, it describes something that is easy to like
by AKACroatalin April 19, 2015
Get the Likeable mug.Yclept is another way of saying also known as or AKA. Its original meaning was “going by the name of” and as such was used, in England, by Victorian police forces if a criminal had more than one name. It was also used by the criminals themselves when they wished to confused members of the general public to whom it was virtually unknown. It can also be used to mean so-called, in the sense of a name given to someone or something that is unfit for purpose. At one time it was believed that the word was related kleptomaniac, that the person it was applied to would steal anything, even another name, however, the origins of Yclept go back to the mediaeval English word “geoclepod” which meant “who is called” or “whose name is”. It’s very rarely used now, but could be useful if you want to bring some wiseass know-it-all down to earth, because you can bet they won’t know what it means.
by AKACroatalin November 20, 2016
Get the Yclept mug.Nemophilia is the love of spending time in forests or woodland, particularly at night; going camping in woodland could probably be considered to be the equivalent of sex, possibly this is what John Denver meant when he wrote Annie’s Song. It does, however, make you wonder what woodland survival training, as practised by the armed forces, would equate to.
by AKACroatalin December 30, 2016
Get the Nemophilia mug.This is the very last one in the series but every single one of them is true! This one tells you that farting isn't rude or disgusting. It may seem that way because they usually smell bad, but it's just something a healthy human body does, a normal by-product of your body digesting food, so if you need to let one go, do it and if anyone objects fuck ‘em.
“Mikey let rip in class, teacher called him on it, so he explained fart Fact 14 to her and suggested if she was worried she should see her doctor. I nearly bust a gut trying not to laugh.”
by AKACroatalin November 03, 2019
Get the Fart Fact 14 mug.