Fart Fact 10

This is a fact, not wishful thinking. If you’re a woman, a fart can really take you by surprise. One woman took to Social Media to ponder something strange that happened to her when she farted. She asked the question "Do you ever fart and the fart goes past your vagina and your labia moves?" She had hundreds of responses from women who had experienced this phenomenon which, apparently, is called a vart.

“Kim’s just let go a vart.”
“How do you know?”
“Her snatch wobbled, Fart Fact 10.”

by AKACroatalin October 30, 2019

Latibule

It means a cosy, safe place, hidden away from everyone which is special to you. It’s the sort of place where, on frory days, you can kick off your shoes and settle down in your huffle-buffs, maybe for a bit of firkytoodling or just to relax. See also Hibernacle.

Everyone should have a latibule so that they can get away from unwelcome demands on their time.

by AKACroatalin January 10, 2017

All talk and no action

All talk and no action is a description that can be applied to the chattering classes, certain politicians, incompetent managers, just about anyone who talks a lot, usually rubbish or irrelevancies, about a problem or situation but does sod all to resolve it. It can also be applied to males or females who talk a lot about sex, but when it comes down to getting physical run a mile

“How did you get on with that bird from HR last night?”
“Waste of time, all talk and no action.”

by AKACroatalin June 09, 2015

Neology

It is a noun with at last four meanings:
1 The study or art of creating new words.
2 The act of introducing a new word into a language.
3 The use of an existing word in a new way.
4 The holding of novel or rational religious views. (Although this definition is now largely obsolete.)

1 Neology is a hobby of mine.
2 I’ve just had a new word accepted by the Oxford English Dictionary. Neology!
3 Urban Dictionary is a catalyst for neology
4 Believing that we are all just the dream of a sleeping cat is not necessarily a neology.

by AKACroatalin April 20, 2015

Squitter

Slang from South West England, a squitter is a thoroughly nasty, smelly, disgusting squirt of liquid or semi-liquid faecal matter. Usually used as a plural, the squitters is an attack of diarrhoea brought on usually by overindulgence in alcoholic refreshment. Using squitter in the singular form means a single squirt of repulsive, stinking, watery shit and by extension a repulsive, stinking, watery shit of a person. In both cases the best thing to do is flush the toilet with plenty of disinfectant.

"Malcolm, you're nothing but a two-faced squitter!"

by AKACroatalin April 16, 2015

Jibber Jabber

Jibber jabber is Incoherent and unintelligible rapid speech often in slang or patois. Used in the UK as a disparaging name for other languages such as French, Spanish or American.

“It was all jibber jabber. Couldn’t understand a dam’ word the wretched feller was sayin’, Jeeves.”
“But, Milord, he was an American.”
“Yes?”

by AKACroatalin June 04, 2015

Traffic Jam

This is sometimes found in supermarkets where someone, usually female, with an arse so enormous it makes the average two-seater look small, shoving a trolley piled high with junk food, suddenly stops. This may be because she’s suddenly gone AWTF or it could be because she’s trying to decide whether to have ten or twelve krispy kremes to help her recover from all this strenuous shopping. She blocks the aisle, traffic builds up behind and in front of her, the fat cow is deaf to polite requests to move or even, “Get out of the way you fucking mammoth!” The result is gridlock and it usually takes half an hour and several members of staff to get things sorted out. See also Road Block.

“I was shopping in ASDA and got caught in a traffic jam.”
“What did you do?”
“Dumped the trolley and went to TESCO.”

by AKACroatalin August 15, 2016