Definitions by Uncle Dimma
ballistic
mother: sons, i am gone to my hairdresser appointment, i don't want you to ballistic on each other, i know you like to fight, but please watch TV comme du monde while I am gone.
older son: yes mom!.
older son: yes mom!.
ballistic by Uncle Dimma August 31, 2013
button the lip
mother: Damian, stop telling everyone your limo is triple parked, i won't stand for it any longer; go do your homework.
Damian: sorry mom, Nelson Muntz and Bart Simpson stole my homework and then burnt it.
mother: I am disturbed by your behavior, now button the lip, and get in the car, I am taking you for a psyche eval
Damian: sorry mom, Nelson Muntz and Bart Simpson stole my homework and then burnt it.
mother: I am disturbed by your behavior, now button the lip, and get in the car, I am taking you for a psyche eval
button the lip by Uncle Dimma August 31, 2013
Hannibal Lecter humor
This definition of Hannibal Lecter humor refers to a type of humor that only Hannibal Lecter, the character from both the book and the movie The Silence of the Lambs, would find funny.
Hannibal Lecter humor by Uncle Dimma August 30, 2013
methylphenidate
teacher: does anyone know what the common name for methylphenidate is?
student: i think it's Ritalin, i mean the non vox populi name of the drug you mentioned.
teacher: correct.
student: i think it's Ritalin, i mean the non vox populi name of the drug you mentioned.
teacher: correct.
methylphenidate by Uncle Dimma August 29, 2013
we, humans, are creatures of habit
a) the most pragmatic, rational (IMHO) response to the rhetorical questions of "why do old habits die hard"? and "why do people resist change"?
b) a nicer way of telling someone "no matter how hard you try to change someone they will always retain part of their individuality and be what they want to be"
b) a nicer way of telling someone "no matter how hard you try to change someone they will always retain part of their individuality and be what they want to be"
a teenage boy comes crying to his father : "why won't my girlfriend Meredith follow me to Concordia University in Mechanical Engineering; all she wants to do is go to Mcgill University and do Psychology. Is there anything I can do? Should I commit a St Valentines Day Massacre on her?
father: no and no. No, she doesn't deserve that you commit a St Valentines Day Massacre on her, and no, you can't do a rat's ass about it, simply because the cherry-phrase we, humans, are creatures of habit applies not only to her, but everyone else in the world as well.
father: no and no. No, she doesn't deserve that you commit a St Valentines Day Massacre on her, and no, you can't do a rat's ass about it, simply because the cherry-phrase we, humans, are creatures of habit applies not only to her, but everyone else in the world as well.
we, humans, are creatures of habit by Uncle Dimma August 28, 2013
doff me a hat
a phrase meaning
1) show me respect please and/or show me more respect that you are currently showing me
2) (offensive/rude) a man asking a woman to drop everything she is doing and immediately give him a blowjob
1) show me respect please and/or show me more respect that you are currently showing me
2) (offensive/rude) a man asking a woman to drop everything she is doing and immediately give him a blowjob
girlfriend: please doff me a hat and appreciate me more, i could your dinner everyday.
boyfriend: no, you should doff me a hat; i would like you to be able to give me more blowjobs.
boyfriend: no, you should doff me a hat; i would like you to be able to give me more blowjobs.
doff me a hat by Uncle Dimma August 28, 2013
wet dog shake
a) (humorous); what you do when when you come out of the shower with your hair dripping wet and you are too bloody lazy to use either a towel or a blow dryer to dry your hair comme du monde.
b) (drug addiction withdrawal symptom) : episodes of literal 'wet dog' uncontrollable shaking engaged in in by drug addicts undergoing withdrawal, especially withdrawal from heroin and or cocaine
b) (drug addiction withdrawal symptom) : episodes of literal 'wet dog' uncontrollable shaking engaged in in by drug addicts undergoing withdrawal, especially withdrawal from heroin and or cocaine
mother: Stan, why the hell is the bathroom floor wet again?
Stan: lol, don't ask stupid question, you won't receive a stupid answer. It's lol because I just did a wet dog shake; i was to lazy to use a blow dryer.
mother: Stan, I hope this wasn't f-sag. Now go take a mop and mop the bathroom floor
Stan: lol, don't ask stupid question, you won't receive a stupid answer. It's lol because I just did a wet dog shake; i was to lazy to use a blow dryer.
mother: Stan, I hope this wasn't f-sag. Now go take a mop and mop the bathroom floor
wet dog shake by Uncle Dimma August 27, 2013