Definitions by Nick

Microsoft Works 

1) Word processing program by the Microsoft Corporation

2) Oxymoron

1) Microsoft Works sucks, I'm going to get a bootlegged copy of Office.

2) Microsoft works? No it doesn't.

Microsoft Works by Nick April 3, 2003

Humberside 

Ficticious place

You live in Humberside

Humberside by Nick April 1, 2003

Banff 

(adj.)
Pertaining to, or descriptive of, that kind of facial expression which is impossible to achieve except when having a passport photograph taken, which results in happas (q.v.).

Banff by Nick March 28, 2003

Boinka

The noise through the wall which tells you that the people next door enjoy a better sex life than you do.

Boinka by Nick March 28, 2003

Corriemuchloch 

(n.)
The kind of person who can make a complete mess of a simple job like walking down a corridor

Corriemuchloch by Nick March 28, 2003

Corriearklet 

(n.)
The moment at which two people, approaching from opposite ends of a long passageway, recognise each other and immediately pretend they haven't. This is to avoid the ghastly embarrassment of having to continue recognising each other the whole length of the corridor.

Corriearklet by Nick March 28, 2003

Gignog 

(n.)
Someone who, through the injudicious application of alcohol, is now a great deal less funny than he thinks he is.

Gignog by Nick March 28, 2003