4 definitions by ?fruit

Slang word for cannabis/marijuana commonly used in the counties of Hampshire and Surrey.

Commonly used by students or former students of private schools

The word mallard is derived from the distinctive "green" of the male mallard duck's head

The word mallard can be combined with a number of words used for groups on animals in order to denote weight.

These are:

Flock(8thoz) School (1/4oz) Pack (1/2oz) Litter(1oz)

This sytem of weights is easily remembered by the phrase fucking stupid pikey loser.
"hey mate, have you got any mallards for this weekend?"
"not sure how many do you need?"
"If you could get us out a School would be much appreciated"
"Should do that will be about 40 spond ok?"
"Nice one"

example 2
"you been duck hunting?"
"yeah mate, got a brace of the buggers"
"have you seen a flock of them?"
"Sure thing, give us a ring later"
by ?fruit February 13, 2013
A coach, team owner, athletic director or public official who publicly excuses , colludes or conceals the illegal activities of an athlete/s for financial or professional gain to the detriment of wider society.

They can usually be found in newspaper and TV puff pieces defending the athlete with proclamations of "He did a bad thing and he regrets it , but he's good now."
Person 1 : "Did you see the news? The running back of (Insert sports team) just got arrested for breaking some guys face because he cut him up in traffic.
Person 2: Ahhh shit there goes our season he is going to have to go to jail.
Person 1: Nah his silver haired middle aged white man will be on the phone to the sheriffs office getting that shit squashed.
by ?fruit March 31, 2017
A description for any negative situation or event which directly effects ones life as a consequence of Brexit
"We got called into a meeting today with head office today. They are going to downsize the England office and move most of the back staff operations to Germany. We have been Brexifucked"

"Our bank will not give us a mortgage even though we have a descent sized deposit because Francine is french and doesn't have permanent residence. We have been utterly Brexifucked"

"Our suppliers have increased out costs because Sterling is in the toilet. We're Brexifucked"
by ?fruit March 31, 2017
A small dicked person of low intelligence with no critical thinking ability and a hatred for gays, arabs, Indians, jews, Mexicans and blacks which they mask by claims of "Restoring pride in the flag" .

They also hate abortion unless it's the unborn fetus of an artificially inseminated lesbian woman.
I was stuck on the bus listening to a guy tell me that Planned Parenthood is a secret pedophile network and that global warming isn't real. A total fucking Breitbastard.
by ?fruit March 28, 2017