what the hey 

The most useless catchphrase known to man, much more so than "wocka wocka wocka" or "criminy jim-jim." Yes, some grungabiliacs might think "what the hey" originated in that childfest "The Suite Life of Zakkh and Cody," or in the frequently asked questions (FAQ'z, if you will) on "Weird Al" Yankovic's website, or even in a modest but kinda mediocre "Far Side" cartoon by that King of Cartoons "Gary Larson"--but the truth is that "what the hey" was devised by the Rev. Oral McJorrity to keep Satan's House off Christian tongues. (hell)

"What the hey was in those popsickles?"
"Tobacco, marijuana, cocaine, heroin, LSD, PCP, ecstasy, and um, toxic waste to give it the color."
"Oh my jeez! That's fudgin' bad!"

-A chat between a McJorrity man and a not-so McJorrity man.

what the hey by Dead Cousin Ted January 13, 2008

What the Hey-Hey! 

The mommy-friendly way of saying what the actual fuck when you know that children are present. (Usually used by blogger mommies.)

Rachel: My husband slept with his secretary.
Jess: What the Hey-Hey!

What the Hey-Hey! by Izzy_M101 February 22, 2021

who said what in the hey now? 

what did you just say?

I thought you just called my mother a cunt? Who said what in the hey now?

who said what in the hey now? by shoop April 21, 2006

DNA WhattheHey! 

The moment at birth, examining a family photo, or just at random when you realize your offspring look nothing like the silicone bag bearing, botox injected, liposucked, rhinoplasted, forehead lifted, and tummy tucked person you call your wife. When you realize you've been duped and that your wife hasn't fully revealed the quantity of plastic surgery she's had done. This epiphany may also be triggered by a family photo causing you to suddenly understand why your wife looks as if she just stepped out of Vogue compared to the more homely qualities of your children.

Jim (watching wife give birth in operating room)...Hey what the f***. That's not my child!

Doctor: Oh yes it is! It's just another case of DNA WhatTheHey! Happens all the time.

DNA WhattheHey! by Amovida December 10, 2011