upholstered 

Overweight, obese, tubby. May refer to a man or woman. A person who would qualify as a hippo could be refered to as being "well upholstered."

He is so upholstered that a heart attack is imminent.

upholstered by Bill Peters October 14, 2006

upholstered 

To be so high you become one with the couch.

Man after i smoked that blunt, i was upholstered.

upholstered by Big8ball September 23, 2016

upholstered 

obese, fat, plump, overwieght

If you were not so upholstered you would fit in the seats better.

upholstered by Light Joker November 3, 2006

upholstery 

Slang for the hair on a woman's upper legs, stomach, and back.

Guy to a red haired girl: So, does the carpet match the drapes?
Red haired girl: Yeah. But not the upholstery.

(Thanks xkcd!)

upholstery by Tanaka Mushi April 4, 2009

palate for upholstery 

When you have a particular fondness of the taste of carpet in your mouth, also known as a rug muncher or a lesbian.

Wow, look at that girl with the short spikey hair, she definitely has a palate for upholstery

palate for upholstery by juleybee December 14, 2010

upholstery 

Slang/meme for Armpit hair

Started by xkcd

I'd prefer a girl with ZERO upholstery

upholstery by annhltr April 4, 2009

upholstery orphans 

the loads of baby batter that drip down your crack and leaves stains on your upholstery

Bitch, look at all the upholstery orphans on the couch, you shoulda taken that shit to the bathroom for a porcelain abortion for real!

upholstery orphans by squeak69 November 28, 2009