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When you get a wee piece of wood stuck in you hand that just won't budge. It is that fucking irratating that you end up chewing your hand off!
Another term fora splinter except a skelf is 10 times worse!
Skelf by Scottish Kaz October 20, 2003
1. One who can act normal and live an everyday life, but loaths it and can easily change personalities.

2. One who creates illusions to convice the common folk
Susan: Hi Tom! You look happy today!
Tom: Yeah I "look" happy...

Susan: What is that suppose to mean?
Tom: My girlfriend dumped me, Im all broken inside. But Im gonna act like I'm on top of the world to make her life miserable!
Susan: {blank expression}
Tom: Yeah, I know. I'm a Skelf.
Skelf by DarkenArtist June 12, 2009
A Skelf is a Skeletonized Elf.

Cute, but deadly.
Oh shit, there's a skelf, we better get a ninja to kill him.
skelf by Mammothman June 15, 2007
v: Originally a combination of "Skoal" and "shelf" (as in to "bottom shelf"), this is the act of placing a wad of chewing tobacco or dip in one's mouth.
n: The wad of smokeless tobacco itself.
v: I'm skelfing to get a pick me up.
n: When I'm drinking I have to thow a skelf in.
skelf by Jack Verella June 20, 2006

Self-aggrandising 

Self-aggrandising is what people who have got fuck-all going for them do. It means boasting about yourself and your abilities, telling everyone how wonderful you are, broadcasting copious quantities of bullshit thickly overlaid with FIGJAM. Normal people exposed to the effects of some self-aggrandising nonentity usually experience attacks of acute nausea followed by the need to get as far away as possible from the source irritation.
Malcolm you are a self-aggrandising WOFS with the mental capacity of a demented amoeba.

Self-guilt

The biggest bitch you will ever meet, only thing is it's inside your mind.
Self-guilt: you're awful, it's always your fault!
Self-guilt by my_dark_thoughts July 17, 2019