1. One who can act normal and live an everyday life, but loaths it and can easily change personalities.
2. One who creates illusions to convice the common folk
Susan: HiTom! You look happy today!
Tom: Yeah I "look" happy...
Susan: What is that suppose to mean?
Tom: My girlfriend dumped me, Im all broken inside. But Im gonna act like I'm on top of the world to make her life miserable!
Susan: {blank expression}
Tom: Yeah, I know. I'm a Skelf.
v: Originally a combination of "Skoal" and "shelf" (as in to "bottom shelf"), this is the act of placing a wad of chewing tobacco or dip in one's mouth.
n: The wad of smokeless tobacco itself.
v: I'm skelfing to geta pick me up.
n: When I'm drinking I have to thow a skelf in.
Self-aggrandising is what people who have got fuck-all going for them do. It means boasting about yourself and your abilities, telling everyone how wonderful you are, broadcasting copious quantities of bullshit thickly overlaid with FIGJAM. Normal people exposed to the effects of some self-aggrandising nonentity usually experience attacks of acute nausea followed by the need to get as far away as possible from the source irritation.
Malcolm you are a self-aggrandising WOFS with the mental capacity of a demented amoeba.
An absolutely foolproof way to keep minors from viewing content deemed "too mature" for them to watch.
Billy: "So I was trying to watch some videos for an M rated game, and I ran into an age gate, so I put in my real birthday. SOMEHOW it managed to figure out that I am 12. CURSE YOU AGE GATE!!!"
Bill: "Fucking age gate! *quick scroll* THERE! I was born on January 1, 1904. Fuck you age gate."