schweff

A Muff Diver.
ie, someone who spends 80% of his life trying to get action, even off minging fat girls, whilst completely neglecting his friends.

Teacher: "Where's paddy?"
Boy: "He's over at margarets"
Teacher. "f*cking SCHWEFF!"

schweff by Fr Gabby November 19, 2006

schweff

Guy who befriends attractive females he fancies but doesn't have the balls to ask them out.
Content to merely hang around them all the time. A sort of straight gal pal. His schweffing often alienates him from his male counterparts.

'Man, Is Paddy sitting beside Laura again today?'
'Yeah, That guy is such a schweff!'

schweff by poy46 March 22, 2009

Schweff

a boy who disregards his friends to get with a girl but never has the balls to do anything so they end up life long friends. and nothing more.

also known as a rech.

'where did you go last night, didnt see much of you'
'i stayed at a friends'
'did you stay over at sarah's?'
'yeh but nothing happened, but i walked across the room whilst she was on skype to her boyfriend'
'you massive schweff!!'

Schweff by Ben Moat September 26, 2009

Schweff

A man who chooses ho's over bro's

did u see will treadwell last night walked off from us after some yats?

Fucking Schweff

Schweff by willIam@scweffwell May 8, 2010

Schweff

Someone who always flirts with the girls, a proper schweff never gets any action though

BOY ONE "goldwait is the true king schweff of the school"

BOY TWO "yeah but sarge is a proper schweff, never gets any action"

Schweff by Malvern College!!!! May 19, 2009

Schweff

A guy who spends loads of time with girls and ditches his mates to be with them, but never gets any pussy.

Schweff: Yeah, Katie and I are like best friends. I think she likes me!

Schweff's Friend: Look mate, she doesn't like you as in she wants to fuck you. She likes you because you are a schweff.

Schweff by silent_deadly123 October 5, 2011

Schweff

Somebody who tries to hit on girls, but only stays in the friendzone for ever, and ever, and ever ever. Basically a schweff is the personification of friendzone.

"Hey, did you stay over at Lara's last night?"
"Nah mate, nothing happened, I just walked her back to her ex boyfriend's house.."
"Aaa mate you're a massive schweff!!!"

Schweff by StellaDrinkerNotts June 21, 2017