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norwegian vampire 

A vampiric female that can live up to 300 years. This particular breed sucks the life out of a human not by blood, rather by sperm. Despite their age, their aging process is relative to that of humans (i.e. a 200 year old Norwegian Vampire will look like a 60 year old woman). Norwegian Vampires can only birth females, which is why no one has ever seen a male Norwegian Vampire.

When they bite, they don't go for the neck as a traditional vampire does. Instead, she might seduce you into your hotel room or roofie your drink to bring you to her own home, where she gives you the best blow job of your life, undoubtedly due to her centuries of experience. In the midst of the action, she lowers her head and aims for the scrotum, maybe telling you to "relax" as she leans in to massage your testacles with her tongue. Then, in a matter of seconds, you feel an intense pain in your genitals, and you pull back only to realize that her locked fangs are penetrating your scrotum, causing your entire ball sac to tear off from the sudden jerk. She spits both testacles into her hands and inserts them into each nostril, forcefully sucking the sperm dry out of each one with a prolonged breath in order to live another day. As you scream on the floor in pain, she eats the pruned remainder of what were once testes in one gulp, and may also swallow the scrotum as well depending on her taste.
Johnny: "Wow, Miss Gilbert from across the street is hot. Isn't she single?"

Johnny's friend: "Hey, before you get any ideas, I heard Matt talking about a Norwegian Vampire living nearby before he went missing. They found his neutered body last night in the ditch two blocks down."

breatharian 

One whos diet consists of air, light, and prana, with a possible sip of water now and then.
The breatharian has air, light, and prana for food.
breatharian by leena gabor November 8, 2005
Word of the Day on June 3, 2026

A Booger In The Nose Of Progress 

Anything that impedes or otherwise interferes with a process going forward.
"Militarily, that inquest was a booger in the nose of progress."

or

"As far as human rights are concerned, this political infighting is a booger in the nose of progress."
Word of the Day on June 2, 2026

🤡🫵🏻

How to say "you're an idiot/clown" using only emojis.
Person 1: Insert completely incorrect and/or idiotic statement here
Person 2: 🤡🫵🏻
Word of the Day on June 1, 2026
Fogey/fogy /fougi/ sl. (early 18C+, orig. Scot) old-fashioned, stuck-in-the mud.
Person with old fashioned ideas which he is unwilling to change: Come to the disco and stop being such an old fogey!
You think me an old fogeyand an old tory, his thoughtful voice said. I saw three generations since O’Connel’s time. I remember the famine. Do you know that the orange lodges agitated for repeal of the union twenty years before O’Connel did or before the prelates of your communion denounced him as a demagogue? You fenians forget some things. (James Joyce, Ulysses. Penguin Books,1992. p. 38)
fogey by Petyush September 14, 2005
Word of the Day on May 31, 2026
Add a tablespoon of jarlic to two teaspoons of butter and spread it in bread to make garlic bread
Jarlic by YSAC fanboy June 6, 2020
Word of the Day on May 30, 2026
An armpit enthusiast — typically of the scent, appearance, and touch of hairy underarms.
That dude’s such a pitpig, I have to wear deodorant to keep him at bay.
Pitpig by wimbledon May 28, 2026
Word of the Day on May 29, 2026