mortician

A band that commits sonic mayhem... a brutal death metal band that is known for its drum machine, downtuned guitars and gutteral vocals, also known for using soundclips from horror movies.

The songs Zombie Apocalypse and Slaughterhouse are my favorite from the album: "Zombie Apocalypse"

by Jamie June 23, 2004

Mortician

A nurse for dead people

Brendan is a sexy mortician

by thiskidbe October 31, 2018

mortician

Noise

I like the band Mortician.

by METAL October 18, 2003

prostitute mortician

A person who is hired to have sex with a corpse who has wished not to die a virgin.

“The dead man needs a prostitute mortician to come in and de-flower him.”

by Hughmungus309 August 30, 2020

The dirty mortician

You tell your partner to go and stand next to the freezer for a while, then return to the bed and act dead so that you can have intercourse. (A walk-in cooler or freezer works best!)

Tim told Autum to go cool off by the freezer so she could play dead and get the dirty mortician on!

by RS THE PIG February 02, 2019

midnight mortician

Midnight mortician is trilogy written by the author of "dear lilac" and "smush!" , Valerie Vancouver. Midnight mortician revolves around an immortal fae named aeliana and an immortal vampire named Magnus.

Have you read midnight mortician by Valerie Vancouver?

No, I haven't

Well you should!

by Valerie Vancouver May 05, 2023

fishin' mortician

A mortician that enjoys fishing.

That fishin' mortician over yonder works on dead people and likes to fish over at Lake Cocksucker.

by Johnny Eightball June 10, 2004