merger

(n.)

1. A transaction in which one corporate entity is combined with another corporate entity. A variety of types of transactions are possible, the most common being the "triangular" merger whereby one corporation ("Buyer") creates a subsidiary ("Merger Sub") into which the other corporation ("Target") is combined, thereby creating a single corporation. A wave of mergers occurred in the 1980s due to the loosening of regulations by the Reagan administration. A similar boom occurred in the late 1990s, and, thus far, a wave of mergers in 2005 suggests that it will be another huge year of corporate combinations. Mergers create corporations with annoying, nonsensical names like "AOL Time Warner," and "JPMorganChase" and "PriceWaterHouseCoopers." Frequently, corporations fail to realize any additional profit from these transactions, despite many workers losing their jobs due to the supposed "efficiencies" created.

2. A transaction performed by the cockiest, least self-aware, obnoxious assholes in the worlds of investment banking and law. The area of expertise in which one performs mergers is known as "Mergers and Acquisitions" or "M&A."

1. The merger of AT&T Wireless and Cingular Wireless expanded the digital network of Cingular substantially.

2.
Corporate Asshole 1: Hey man, what you been up to at the office?
Corporate Asshole 2: Inhaling deeply, cocking head to the side, wiping coke off of nose I'm working on this new merger. I can't tell you anything about it, but dude, this is gonna be huge.
Corporate Asshole 1: Sweet. Dude, have you heard this new band called the Killers? They are so awesome.
Corporate Asshole 2: Yeah, they rock. When you getting off work?
Corporate Asshole 1: Probably 2 a.m. After that, I'm going to Lemon Bar.

merger by JLB3 April 29, 2005

merger

In urban driving, someone who merges correctly onto traffic circles and highways. The opposite of a stopper.

1. There was two kinds of drivers who approach traffic circles, mergers and stoppers.

2. Give me a whole day having to drive behind timid mergers, just please not a stopper!

merger by Boston Driver April 13, 2013

merger

(n.) - This word means nothing.

"Merger" means nothing.

merger by Sage May 8, 2004

Merger Dump 

A dump that is the by-product of eating too many White Castle burgers and holding it in for a couple days. A noticeable line, or merging point (hence the name merger dump) is present. This generally marks the point where two dumps join into one.

"Yo check out my Merger Dump!"
"Damn, three lines? You been holding that shit in for a while haven't you?"

Merger Dump by Docta Dre ecstacy October 20, 2009

merger of equals 

When one company merges with the other to jack it up.

The merger of equals between Mercedes and Chrysler. 10 years later they're F-ing broke and Mercedes is trying to drop them like a bad habit.

merger of equals by OoTLink March 31, 2007

merger fatigue

From a company merger, a disease known as “merger fatigue” occurs when an employee (which epidemic quickly spreads to others) of the “mergered” company will lose their job at some unscheduled yet certain time in the near future causing disorientation with this lengthy process. As the Trojan horse is rolled in, sharks circle the dead carcass limp in the deep waters of the corporate world for a feeding frenzy; weariness of an employee due to the diminution and irritability of the fact that one’s once prominent work has been diminished to the repetitive conditions of detailing so other’s may receive credit and take over that work.

Sometimes companies move too slowly because of “merger fatigue”, where employees tire of the rigors of concentrated focus and continuous effort. That, in turn, slows movement and progress, and what should take one or two months to accomplish ends up taking a year.

How does this work? I would have never thought of this – something so complicated yet made so simple. We need to have this, can you show us all you know? Policy dictates we comply; yet “merger fatigue” blames the CEO of selling us out for millions in several years of large bonuses and salaries, and a position on the Board of Directors of the purchasing company, while company employees get severance pay only if they stay to complete the company dismantlement and absorption, and providing cooperation with the other company’s employees to complete this task. - Thinking: Corporate America Nowadays, Corporate Greed, Golden Parachute, Who's the Last One To Turn Out The Lights?!?

merger fatigue by cheyenne bodie July 22, 2009

Turd Merger 

When two or more turds come together to form a single unit.

Note: Originally defined by the character Artemis in the hit comedy, "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia,"

Guy 1: Wow! Did you see that turd merger someone left in the toilet?
Guy 2: Yah that was a beastly piece of crap!

Turd Merger by the Hot Rod enthusiast November 25, 2009