Skip to main content

Masturbating Monkey

Gay monkey that sits in the zoo cage, shows you its dick and then jacks of to your kidz standin at the window staring at them.
Q: Mummy, what's that monkey doing?
A: Never mind. Now Tonianne get away from that window and lets go to the lion cage now.
Masturbating Monkey by Sarah April 1, 2004

Masturbating Monkey

When a monkey in the forest or at the zoo get's a erection and grabs his penis and starts to jack off like a car piston and starts shooting sperm all over the place, then he goes "HOOO OHHH AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH HOO HO HOO!!!!" when the male monkey starts to think oh the female monkeys. and sperm starts to land on you and you child.
Child: mommy, WTF IS THAT BLACK MONKEY DOING?!?
Mom: Don't be racist!!! He's just a masturbating monkey

Doctor: hey Steve, that monkey seems to be masturbating?
Steve: I think he is, we should test his heart rate to make sure it's safe for the masturbating monkey.
Steve: ok... WHAT?! IT'S OVER 9000!!!!!!

Masterbating Monkey 

A primate creature who masterbates.

"Monkey Masterbation Spotting" has become a hobby in the South American State of illinois. A well known competitor in the sport of of Monkey Masterbation Spotting is Fred Phelps, a very vocal and fanatically religeous biggot.
The monkey wrapped his primate hand around his primate pink penis, and masterbated furiously untill he fell out of his tree. Fred Phelps watched in glee as he photographed the event so he could show the pictures to his family.
More from Urban Dictionary

Brought-upsy 

scruples; to have manners;

May also be spelt Brought-upsie

WestIndian/Caribbean in orient - Barbados, WHUT.
Example 1: Child, you ain't got no brought-upsy?

Translation: My Child, have you not any manners?



Example 2: What, you ain't got no brought-upsy?

Translation: I can't believe you're doing that. Were you not taught any manners as a child?
Brought-upsy by B-Town Gilly April 20, 2005
Word of the Day on September 12, 2026
The practice of modifying a model (not limited to toy action figures) to achieve some result other than that intended by the manufacturer. ...
I had to kitbash my Luke Skywalker figure with my Darth Vader figure because Luke was missing a hand.
kitbash by geru January 15, 2006
Word of the Day on September 11, 2026

Satellite baddies

Attractive women who are far from your location.
There are no hot girls in the area, theres only satellite baddies.
Satellite baddies by Banksy123 September 5, 2026
Word of the Day on September 10, 2026
-Ramifications

-shorthand for the ramifications of actions
Omg, the ramifications!”
-“You forgot about the rammys, bro.”
Rammys by Brandonmical August 4, 2023
Word of the Day on September 9, 2026

Failure Shower 

When you fail at something in life (eg. failing an exam or not getting a job), go home and spend an hour just standing in the shower, propping yourself up against the wall with your eyes on your feet.
Caleb knew the only thing to do after he didnt get prefect was take a failure shower.
Failure Shower by Vikingnz October 27, 2009
Word of the Day on September 8, 2026
Next