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Masturbating Monkey

When a monkey in the forest or at the zoo get's a erection and grabs his penis and starts to jack off like a car piston and starts shooting sperm all over the place, then he goes "HOOO OHHH AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH HOO HO HOO!!!!" when the male monkey starts to think oh the female monkeys. and sperm starts to land on you and you child.
Child: mommy, WTF IS THAT BLACK MONKEY DOING?!?
Mom: Don't be racist!!! He's just a masturbating monkey

Doctor: hey Steve, that monkey seems to be masturbating?
Steve: I think he is, we should test his heart rate to make sure it's safe for the masturbating monkey.
Steve: ok... WHAT?! IT'S OVER 9000!!!!!!

Masterbating Monkey 

A primate creature who masterbates.

"Monkey Masterbation Spotting" has become a hobby in the South American State of illinois. A well known competitor in the sport of of Monkey Masterbation Spotting is Fred Phelps, a very vocal and fanatically religeous biggot.
The monkey wrapped his primate hand around his primate pink penis, and masterbated furiously untill he fell out of his tree. Fred Phelps watched in glee as he photographed the event so he could show the pictures to his family.

church hurt 

church hurt is where you experience a degree of distance, pain, or judgement from your church community. Essentially, you are just unable to “find your place”. This is prevalent in the Christian community, but can be extended to other religions.
Now that I am an adult I am beginning to heal from the church hurt that was inflicted on me as a child.
Word of the Day on May 27, 2026
Huge. Surpassing normal expectations.
I was fishing with a Spinner Bait and a HONKIN pike came after it and hit it . Felt like a lawnmower running over a brick.
honkin by R. LaJoy December 26, 2005
Word of the Day on May 26, 2026

Stealthie 

when you're holding up your phone and making faces at it, as though you are taking a selfie, but you're really taking a picture of the person across from you or the wall or anything else that seems interesting but you don't want to be caught dead taking a picture of.

This action is often made more convincing by wiggling the eyebrows or opening the mouth, to pretend you're trying to get a Snapchat filter to work.
FRIEND A: "Did you just take a stealthie of me?"

FRIEND B (turning phone around): "no I was just using snapchat's new filter, see?"
Stealthie by gwenhyfar October 2, 2016
Word of the Day on May 25, 2026

Summer Teeth 

When someone has a lot of missing teeth.
Mannn, that dude has summer teeth!
What do you mean?
Summer here, summer there...
Summer Teeth by BeckPot August 2, 2012
Word of the Day on May 24, 2026