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Corporate Flagellate 

When corporations - in an attempt to sell more shit - call out their own sins in front of the world and what they're doing to make it better - when, in reality, they're just trying to sell more shit
Brandon: Yo Ron, you see that new Burger King commercial with the farting cows?
Ron: Yeah man, the message was wack but the song was crack.
Brandon: Man, Burger King is such a corporate flagellate

Self-flagellate 

A masochistic masturbatory maneuver in which a male ties a thick string to a fan, positions himself within reach of the string and facing away from it, turns said fan on, and aggressively jacks off while getting whipped furiously by the rotating string.
I asked that dude from the IT department who always asks me if I tried turning the computer off & on to fix a problem why he's been limping all over the office today, and he looked around, made sure no one was around, and then leaned over and whispered to me that he self-flagellated for so long last night that his fan motor overheated. In response, I asked if he turned it off & on to see if it was still functional.
Self-flagellate by sugafiend February 3, 2025

flagellant 

People who, after the Black Death Plague in the 1300's, were both grief stricken and believed they had commited great sins. They would beat themselves with sticks and whips and such as punishment for their sins.
The Black Death brought Flagellants after it had taken its toll on the European cities.
flagellant by chocolatecatzzz April 9, 2013

feline flagellated segment of a fece female parent inseminator 

A polite way of saying the phrase, "pussywhipped piece of shit motherfucker.
This blender is a real feline flagellated segment of a fece female parent inseminator -- the little fucker can't even make a stupid margarita and always reeks like burned wires!

flagellant 

Someone who flagellates her or himself. In particular, a religious ascetic/masochist who attempts to attain a sublime state or to purge disease or sin through whipping or beating her or himself with ropes, chains and/or flails.

In the Warhammer fantasy battle game, flagellants are a type of special unit available to human armies who wield chains/flails, wear no armour and are immune to psychological effects such as fear.
"Oh no! It's flagellants, whipping themselves into a frenzy as usual"
(Warhammer: Dark Omen)
flagellant by Andy April 28, 2004
Hairy thing that makes cells move.
Flagella Shmalella.
flagella by Cheesy Sam October 8, 2003