7
An altered state of being, whether it be chemically enhanced or a result of sleep deprivation and/or sensory overload. Usually occurs in the midst of and/or aftermath of a rowdy social engagement or bender (e.g. a music festival spanning one or more days, consecutive nights of exposure to alcohol and drugs in combination with loud music of an assorted variety, &c.)
Example 1-

Girl: Did you hear about what Tito did this morning?

Dude: No, what?

Girl: He was at the club till it close, and then he had to go to a wedding, so he decided to get a pre-wedding tattoo.

Dude: Are you kidding me?

Girl: It gets worse... he got a tattoo of the Bloody Beetroots logo.

Dude: He is fucking cooked.

Example 2-

Dude: Have you heard from Scott since he's been in Vegas?

Girl: Yeah, he sent me a clip from a pool party he went to where Eric Prydz was playing. He won a stack of money playing roulette and spent most of it on coke.

Dude: Man, he is cooking it!
by Betty Ford Prefect July 07, 2013
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8
Adjective.
(Especially of a chicken) to be slapped at the speed of 3725.95 mph.
Car salesman: *slaps a chicken at the speed of 3725.95 mph* this chicken is cooked.
by Atheon February 22, 2019
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9
Severely messed up, either via temporary intoxication caused by drink or drugs, or it can be used to describe someone's general personalty, in which context it's akin to calling someone a weirdo or strange.
1) Shit man. I am COOKED! Those beers by themselves weren't so bad but the weed and the pills man they cooked me up good.

2) That dude is one of the most cooked people I've ever known. Serious weirdo!
by PlaceLondon March 28, 2016
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10
Slang term: Describing the old condition of somebody's shoes or clothing.
You been rocking those AirMax kicks for a year. Them shits is cooked!
by GabberNYC December 14, 2006
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11
(verb)
To get insulted or made fun of by another person. If they get support from bystanders or a viewing audience then it is extra effective, whether the insults are true or not.

Shoes are a typical target for "cookings".

synonyms:
blazed, riffed, insulted
Cooker"Hey you bought those ugly ass shoes at once upon a child!"

the Cooked "What ?"

Cook watchers"OHHHH you just got cooked !"
by vibraphone July 07, 2010
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13
The epitome of intoxication (generally through canabis, people are generally called "cooked" once they find it impossible to contain a smile or giggles, and look like someone has poured red paint into their eyes.
"Dude, did you see how fucked up Jeremiah was?"

"Yeah, man! That cunt was absolutely cooked"
by Words of anarchy August 26, 2015
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