coffee penus

When you have to uranate every five or ten minutes because you've been drinking too much coffee.

(Rick): {dialing telephone}: beep beep boop beep boop boop beep

{ring...ring...ring...}

(Rick's boss): Hello, this is National Plastics Conglomerate, how may I help you?

(Rick): Hey boss, can't come in today. Got coffee penus and I'd never make the 40-minute commute without pissing all over myself.

(Rick's boss): YOU'RE FIRED!!! ***CLICK!!!***

coffee penus by Telephony November 13, 2011

Small Penis Coffee

A small penis coffee is usually, but not limited to having an excess of added flavor pumps, bright additive food coloring, extra whipped cream, and chocolate syrup. It is always brewed by coffee companies who have to compensate for their low-quality coffee by completely disguising it with additives.

Student #1: Why does the coffee at Meantime Coffee Co. taste so much better than that place on Frankin Street?
Student #2: Because Meantime Coffee Co. actually cares what their coffee tastes like and they don't have to compensate by making SPC or small penis coffee.

Small Penis Coffee by E.A. Davis September 28, 2018