1. An extremely pessimistic person who constantly complains about a problem but does nothing to fix it.
2. Somebody who spends most of their time dicking around on message boards or possibly on urbandictionary.com complaining about all the crappy things in their life.
3. A hilarious comic strip in MAD Magazine about this really pessimistic guy who makes everybody around him miserable.
Emo dude: I'm gonna go online and complain about how much my life sucks because my grades are crappy and I hate my parents and I have no friends!
Regular dude: Get off your ass and do something about it then, bitterman.
by Toxic Orphan April 22, 2005
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a fucktard that will drive you anywhere you want if you ask them to.
"drive me to the store bitterman"
"Oh bitterman get my luggage!"
"Fuck you bitterman, but thanks for the ride, you now have to wait outside your girlfriend's house while i do her... then you can give me a lift home"
by tobin_tubz March 3, 2008
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A man who has evolved beyond the need for some woman to validate his existence and has a desire for the finer things in life, such as self reliance, marijuana or fine Jamaican rum.
Tom: Chase! Dude, I asked her to marry me and she said yes!

Chase: Yeah, alright. *starts packing a bong*

Tom: Dude, what the heck? I just told you she said yes!
.
Chase: Yeah, I heard you. Good job on finding a parasite for your weed and freedom.

Tom: Damn, you're such a bitterman...

Chase: Thanks, now can you get the rum out? *lights the bowl*
by APotSmokingCentipede April 14, 2011
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My bitch. Aka Scruffy. Who can be quite the sarcastic asshole. He's also secretly in love with Victoria. And he wishes he was a cool as Justin Bieber. He also wishes he could rock the scruff like Ashton Kutcher and he hoggs the last of Timothy's girlfriend's cookies. He enjoys torturing others in various ways such as taking embarassing photos of them, jamming thier toes, forcing girls to take a camera out of another girls bra, tickling, making them do all the work while he "supervises", ect. His career is a male prostitute (gigalo), with his partner Clay. They enjoy taking various pictures of themselves all over the Island of Fiji. He is also my art easel. He aspires to become the next member of The Backstreet boys. (we all know that wont happen, but if it does i expect 'Pee On Me' and his cover of 'You Belong with Me' to be on his first album) He is terrible at sting pong. (I will always win). and he will never be able to rock the blonde look.
"Wow do you see that faggot?" "The one in the pink pants? Yeah! Thats Connor Bitterman!"
by I hold the leash. October 31, 2011
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Just go down the street to Suzie, and pay five dollars for a bitterman jackson.
by WorseThanYou September 21, 2016
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