ass napkin

a napkin that is placed in the ass throughout the course of a a day in order to decrease the chances of itching.

*Thanks to a caller on Howard Stern

Good thing I've had that ass napkin in all day, I almost streamlined!

Hey Brutus, gimme one of your ass napkins cuz I have a killer itch!

ass napkin by Brutus Roengardener November 24, 2007

ass napkin

A napkin made from paper towels or sheets of toilet paper placed between your ass cheeks over your butt hole to decrease the chances of getting shit in your underwear.

I took a crap at work and couldn't wipe my ass very good so I placed an ass napkin inside the back of my underwear over my butt until I could get home later and wipe and clean properly.

ass napkin by paulmor909 September 5, 2016

Ass Napkin

Toilet paper; also used as an insult.

You fucking ass napkin!

Ass Napkin by {42}Ix June 8, 2003

Ass napkin

A term usually used to describe a manager of a lending institution who looks like a white monkey, smiles with a grill that looks like it's been pounded in by a bag of melted nickles, and is dumber than a brain dead retard. Can be used interchangeably with the term "ass clown"

My manager Greg is such an ass napkin

Ass napkin by Assnap15 January 9, 2014

Ass napkin

A folded piece of toilet paper or some sort of hemorrhoid pad/wipe that you put in between your ass cheeks to prevent itching.

I had such bad itchy rats ass during work today I had to put in an ass napkin!

Ass napkin by Hor hickie doger November 11, 2021

Ass Napkin

Classy word for toilet paper

After a healthly bowl movement i daintily wiped my cornshoot with a genrous supply of ass napkins

Ass Napkin by Monty Burns January 27, 2024

napkin ass 

Person who only uses 4 plays in a full game of madden

I hate playing that napkin ass it's so annoying

napkin ass by Gottem January 23, 2016