When all else fails, get a bigger hammer
AFTER thoroughly reading the instruction manual, of course, to see if that might help you to get it to work properly without resorting to such drastic measures :D
Seasoned mechanic, talking to an elderly long-retired grease-monkey buddy on the phone: I have a '58 Ford 350 two-ton flatbed here with a frozen rear brake-drum --- I've tried WD-40, I've tried penetrating-oil, I've banged on it with a two-pound sledge, and then even a five-pound sledge, but it still refuses to budge... any ideas?
Aged grease-monkey: Yes, indeed, Son --- get an eight-pounder and really have at it.
Seasoned mechanic, in plaintive shock: But... but... I'll BREAK it if I do THAT!
Aged grease-monkey, confidently: No, you won't --- trust me --- those beefy old solid-iron brakes are made extra-tough, specifically to safely withstand the extra force of being overhauled like this. Just get up your nerve and really clobber on it!
Mechanic, hesitantly: Okaayyy... if you say so... hold the line... gets a huge sledge hammer and reluctantly but resolutely bashes the ancient brake drum, then steps back in wide-eyed surprise when the ponderous hammer just harmlessly bounces off; emboldened, he rears back and really takes a mighty swing at the drum again, knocking the drum loose and sending it flying halfway across the shop. He picks it up and is flabbergasted to see that it is still fully intact, and with only a very minor surface-scuffing. So he lifts the phone again in pleased bewilderment Wow --- you were right... it came off with just two whacks, and I didn't damage it at all!
Aged mechanic: See? Tolja it would be okay... when all else fails, get a bigger hammer!
Aged grease-monkey: Yes, indeed, Son --- get an eight-pounder and really have at it.
Seasoned mechanic, in plaintive shock: But... but... I'll BREAK it if I do THAT!
Aged grease-monkey, confidently: No, you won't --- trust me --- those beefy old solid-iron brakes are made extra-tough, specifically to safely withstand the extra force of being overhauled like this. Just get up your nerve and really clobber on it!
Mechanic, hesitantly: Okaayyy... if you say so... hold the line... gets a huge sledge hammer and reluctantly but resolutely bashes the ancient brake drum, then steps back in wide-eyed surprise when the ponderous hammer just harmlessly bounces off; emboldened, he rears back and really takes a mighty swing at the drum again, knocking the drum loose and sending it flying halfway across the shop. He picks it up and is flabbergasted to see that it is still fully intact, and with only a very minor surface-scuffing. So he lifts the phone again in pleased bewilderment Wow --- you were right... it came off with just two whacks, and I didn't damage it at all!
Aged mechanic: See? Tolja it would be okay... when all else fails, get a bigger hammer!
When all else fails, get a bigger hammer by QuacksO February 13, 2017
Urban Dictionary Merch