Today years old

Phrase used by those who got by in school with C's and refuse to properly refer to how old they are/were.

I was today years old when I found out that the straw holes in Capri Suns are also the dot on the i, why didn't school teach me this????????

by Ani_Mike June 2, 2019

Today years old

A millennial way of saying "recently"

I was today years old when i kissed a girl. Guess what? She liked it

by Johnny Doeb February 11, 2023

Today years old

A phrase grown adults who haven’t lost their virginity yet and still live in their parent’s basement say when they heard something on the internet that usually isn’t true.

I was today years old when I learned that guitar strings are actually made for cutting cheese cubes.

by TheAlwaysCorrect1 February 5, 2023

Today years old

A thing millennials say to intentionally sound like they have damage in their Broca’s area

I was today years old when I learned this *left side of their face starts drooping*

by TheAlwaysCorrect1 January 21, 2023

today years old

A fancy way of saying that you just did or learned something for the first time today.

I was today years old when I found out that it's called duck tape and not duct tape.

He finally lost his virginity when he was today years old.

by BornBlitzed September 7, 2018