Strait of Hormuz
An act of unchecked aggressive imperialist dominance on a public toilet.
A imperialist pooper makes multiple dense hard wads of toilet paper and flushes them all at once to create a difficult clog in the pipe thus "closing the strait."
The unchecked pooper (or next unknowing citizen) then drops a massive chud that can't be flushed because the toilet is clogged. The turd spins around aimlessly like a stranded tanker ship at sea as the water rises. Eventually after too many flushes, the water and turd will overflow onto the floor creating a crisis.
Diplomatic measures must be taken to stop the overflow and open the strait by physically removing the large turd by hand. Then disposing it in a trash can or by throwing it out an open window. Negotiators are then brought in with plumbing tools to open the strait by removing the clog.
A imperialist pooper makes multiple dense hard wads of toilet paper and flushes them all at once to create a difficult clog in the pipe thus "closing the strait."
The unchecked pooper (or next unknowing citizen) then drops a massive chud that can't be flushed because the toilet is clogged. The turd spins around aimlessly like a stranded tanker ship at sea as the water rises. Eventually after too many flushes, the water and turd will overflow onto the floor creating a crisis.
Diplomatic measures must be taken to stop the overflow and open the strait by physically removing the large turd by hand. Then disposing it in a trash can or by throwing it out an open window. Negotiators are then brought in with plumbing tools to open the strait by removing the clog.
Ed: "Hey Mike, I need you to get down here now. We have a Strait of Hormuz situation in the #112 Denny's bathroom!"
Mike: "Not again! I'm calling corporate. Another imperialist unchecked trucker must have been disappointed with the service."
Ed: "Yes! Deb said he hated the waffles and threatened to make a massive unflushable shit in the bathroom. He yelled it infront of multiple families with children dinning in."
Mike: "Dear God! How big is the shit and is the water overflowing?"
Ed: "Yes! The tanker sized turd is one more flush away from from capsizing onto the floor."
Mike: "Ed, your going to have to grab the turd with your bare hands and put it in the trash can to save this franchise. Do it now! I just called corporate to send in negotiators to open the strait. They are on the way.
Ed: "The turd is in my hand! It's heavy Mike! Dropping it in the trash can now. It must be 15 pounds!"
Mike: "You're a real hero Ed! I'm giving you a raise so you'll make $10 an hour now. Negotiators are on the way. Hopefully no more unchecked imperialist truckers full of shit will close the strait again."
Mike: "Not again! I'm calling corporate. Another imperialist unchecked trucker must have been disappointed with the service."
Ed: "Yes! Deb said he hated the waffles and threatened to make a massive unflushable shit in the bathroom. He yelled it infront of multiple families with children dinning in."
Mike: "Dear God! How big is the shit and is the water overflowing?"
Ed: "Yes! The tanker sized turd is one more flush away from from capsizing onto the floor."
Mike: "Ed, your going to have to grab the turd with your bare hands and put it in the trash can to save this franchise. Do it now! I just called corporate to send in negotiators to open the strait. They are on the way.
Ed: "The turd is in my hand! It's heavy Mike! Dropping it in the trash can now. It must be 15 pounds!"
Mike: "You're a real hero Ed! I'm giving you a raise so you'll make $10 an hour now. Negotiators are on the way. Hopefully no more unchecked imperialist truckers full of shit will close the strait again."
Strait of Hormuz by UncleDaddyPopPop April 27, 2026
