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Squelchmaxxing

When you cover yourself in Vaseline and get in a tightly enclosed space like a tub or a closet with a hardwood floor, coat the surface with glycerin, and proceed to move about as fast as physically possible. A typical squelch session will end with either being ejected from said space, concussing against the borders of said space, or passing out from exhaustion and/or an unforeseen allergic reaction to the glycerin.

Squelching takes place in what's commonly referred to as a squelch laboratory, or in parts of the Midwest, a squelchatorium.

Competitive squelchmaxxing is graded upon longevity of the squelch, as well as the peak and average squelch velocity.
Did you hear that the Lithuanian team has been banned from any further squelchmaxxing in the Summer Olympics due to a controversy involving porpoise growth hormones?

My kid was sent to the principals office for attempting to squelch in the supply closet. When did squelchmaxxing become so taboo? This used to be a country. We will be homeschooling Jimmy from now on.
Squelchmaxxing by Squelchmaxxchamp'87 February 27, 2025
Related Words

squanchmaxxing 

Becoming a God and maxxing out ones abilities in the act of masturbation while hanging oneself.
Example 1.
"Hey dude, did you hear that Name died while squanching??"
"Yeah man! I heard he was squanchmaxxing so he could show off and rizz his Discord E-Kittens"

Example 2.
To get better at squanching, you need to devote yourself to squanchmaxxing so you can become a God.
squanchmaxxing by squidelish June 16, 2024
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NYC people who migrate north to Quahog, RI to see the leaves in the fall.
New York and everyone from there can fornicate themselves with an iron stick.
leafers by ss++ February 8, 2005
Word of the Day on September 27, 2026

Respectfully 

Precedes or follows either a gratuitously disrespectful or honest remark, originated in New York City. Used in similar fashion to "no offense" or "to be honest," interchangeably.
Ya mans is wild buns, respectfully. Respectfully he's washed.

After school, The Modells on Jamaica Ave was active. Respectfully.
Respectfully by john quan the first December 20, 2020
Word of the Day on September 26, 2026

You met me at a very Chinese time in my life

A moment in time where you feel distinctly Chinese over all other things.
Dante: "I wish I could be Nigerian, but I can't because I'm Chinese. You met me at a very Chinese time in my life."
Word of the Day on September 25, 2026
Adjective. Used to describe persons who have adjusted or altered their lifestyle for environmental reasons. Crunchy persons tend to be politically strongly left-leaning and may be additionally but not exclusively categorized as vegetarians, vegans, eco-tarians, conservationists, environmentalists, neo-hippies, tree huggers, nature enthusiasts, etc.

Also used to describe establishments where alternative foods and products are sold, i.e. natural food stores.

Modified derivative of granola.
"I need more crunchy guys in my life. I'm so tired of dating preppy metrosexual assholes."

"I'm heading out to the crunchy store to pick up some fair trade chocolate and tea tree oil, do you need anything?"
crunchy by EBC July 11, 2007
Word of the Day on September 24, 2026
A group of people, typically women, searching through someone’s digital footprint in order to find more information about that person.
Susie wasn’t sure if her new Hinge match was a creep, so she assembled Galantir and they found out he used to post slurs on gaming forums.
Galantir by Ge-sus September 22, 2026
Word of the Day on September 23, 2026
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