splinters 

an STD made of all the current STDs combined

Frank: "Look at that girl from North Marion, daayyyummm."

Dank: "Dude, I wouldn't touch that. I heard she has splinters!"

splinters by bwoodd November 23, 2010

Splinters 

People who defy the rules of breaking up.

Splinters often have knee-jerk responses to "I'm sorry, sweetie, but this isn't working anymore" and will reply with "Oh yeah, well, you're a whore"

Splinters by Robert Lanham, Author of Food Court Druids, Cherohonkees, and Other Creatures Unique to the Republic August 4, 2004

Splinters 

When a woman hasn't shaved in awhile, and you feel very little hairs as grope her leg.

Damn girl, you got splinters!

Splinters by pistolpetee January 7, 2010

splinters up your arse 

to have splinters up your arse, usually as a result of fence-sitting.
Often used in relation to someone who is bisexual.

Jim: Rory's been spreading rumours bout you
Ben: You serious?
Jim: Yeah mate, he's been saying you got splinters up your arse.
Ben: Me? I'd rather be emo, wait, they're the same thing!

splinters up your arse by Lukus McTaggert April 11, 2008

Catching Splinters 

A figurative term originating in the South used by one who is driving a car with wood grain on the steering wheel.

"I'ma be working wood wheel and catching splinters, riding twenty inches or better on chrome." -Paul Wall, Chunk Up The Deuce

Catching Splinters by mikeyrocks May 8, 2009

Fart splinters 

When you fart so hard it feels like splinters are coming out of your anus. Often times experinced when sneezing and farting at the same time.

That spicy Indian food gave me the fart splinters.

I snezed so hard it gave me the fart splinters

Fart splinters by Fart splinters October 2, 2017

Masters Splinters 

An unfortunate situation in which a large splinter lodges itself in the asscheek tissue of an individual through forced entry.

“Oh my god, That man copped Masters Splinters.”

Masters Splinters by Glizzy goblin January 19, 2021