Skip One Rule

This is a rule that occurs many times a day across the United States and the rest of the civilized world.

The Skip One Rule (aka. The Skip One Law) is put into effect when you are in a mens room and there is more than a 1:2 men to urinal ratio.

The Law states that in the event of selecting a urinal, there must be a one urinal gap between other occupants of the mens room.

There have been cases in which the breaker of the Skip One Rule has been called out violently and eventually brutally beaten to death by a bathroom shy paranoid-schizophrenic in an event very similar to road rage.

There are a few exceptions dealing with extenuating circumstances to this rule for example:

1) If you are intoxicated this law, and all other laws do not apply.

2) In a trough style urinal situation. When urinating into a trough one should try his best to urinate at a 45* angle away from the nearest fellow urinater, remember NEVER MAKE EYE CONTACT!

3a) Huge sporting event restrooms, chances are you don't know the guy next to you and you will never see him again this tends to free up some inhibitions.

3b) It's OK to take a leak right next to another man if you are in a hurry to get back to the ball game. Disclaimer: During halftime this rule is dissolved.

4) If the urinals in question have large dividers and are more than 5.5 feet apart from center mast then they are fair game.

Warning: none of these exceptions apply when dealing with a Bathroom Shy Paranoid-schizophrenic so be careful.

Bathroom Shy Paranoid-schizophrenic: "What the FUCK are you doing?!?!"

Unaware stranger who just broke the rule: " I'm trying to take a piss."

Bathroom Shy Paranoid-schizophrenic: "What?, Your looking at my dick, why are you so close to me, What The Fuck!!!!"

Unaware stranger who just broke the rule: "Where did you get that knife?, No No Shit Noooooo!"

Bathroom Shy Paranoid-schizophrenic: "Don't tell me what to do bathroom sink, you don't even know me."

Unaware stranger who just broke the rule (now bloody and dying): "Damn I forgot the Skip One Rule"

Skip One Rule by K1LL_4_FUN March 16, 2011